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It wasn’t a small patch, either.
Of course it wasn’t.
This was me we were talking about, and I never did embarrassment and shame by halves.
So, this was it. Today was the day Mother Nature decided to pay me a visit. Nine days after my sixteenth birthday.
Better late than never.
In the middle of school.
Oh dear Jesus.
Well, at least the excruciating stomach cramps made sense now.
In my defense, how the hell was I supposed to know? Never in my life had I encountered such gut-wrenching pelvic stabbing. Because this was my first proper period.
Grabbing my schoolbag and a handful of paper towels, I bolted into one of the stalls and locked the door behind me. Shimmying out of my skirt, I yanked off my tights and knickers, crying when blood smeared my legs.
Oh god.
Don’t panic, Shannon. Don’t freak out.
Inhaling a steadying breath, I quickly set to work cleaning myself up with only one thought in my mind.
Running away.
As soon as I was reasonably respectable looking, I was going straight home to bury my head under my blankets and die of shame in peace.
Pulling out my phone, I sent a freebie call me to Joey because, like usual, I didn’t have any damn credit, and also like usual, I needed him to come save me.
He didn’t respond.
Digging inside of my bag, I hunted for the tampon I knew I wouldn’t find because why the hell would I find one?
It was like Mother Nature had decided to grace me with three years’ worth of period pains and shame in this very moment.
God.
Grunting out a harsh breath, I clutched my stomach and held still, hoping I would find some relief.
I didn’t.
I also rooted for the money I didn’t have so I could buy sanitary towels I couldn’t afford in the machine in the bathroom.
Two euro.
All I needed was a pathetic two-euro coin and I didn’t even have that.
Thankfully, I did find a spare pair of underwear so I made a makeshift sanitary pad out of paper towels while tears streamed down my cheeks.
I was well aware that I didn’t need to be crying over this. It was perfectly normal. But I was upset, embarrassed, and unprepared.
For once in my life, I wished things could go smoothly for me.
I was so tired of my life railroading me. I needed a reprieve.
I cleaned my skirt as best I could before slipping it back on. Then I yanked my jumper off and tied it around my waist to conceal the stain of shame. My legs were bare, my arms sleeveless, and I looked entirely out of place for March weather.
