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When I entered the castle’s gates, I made a quick left turn towards the gardens. Maybe Cassius was here, and I would ask him why he was such a prick, but if not, I would sit by the fountains to help calm my racing heart. I rounded the tall hedge that served as an entrance to the garden and just kept walking. It was more likely for me to get lost in the vast gardens than find him.
I stopped at the sound of faint voices floating through the air. Cassius stood in front of a black stone fountain with another man with dark blonde hair and a stunning woman. The woman was talking closely to Cassius. I couldn’t hear what was being said over the water of the fountain, but it looked serious judging by their rigid statures and furrowed brows.
The other man stood watching but said nothing. The woman moved closer to him. Her vibrant blonde hair was blowing softly in the wind, and she was dressed impeccably well in a silk white dress. Was this what he meant when he said he had better things to do with his time? Meet beautiful women in the gardens?
My eyes watched the Wisp appear next to him and instantly turned black. She had never been that color before. I didn’t care what he did, but apparently, Wisp did. The woman’s hands touched him as they spoke, and he didn’t stop her. Suddenly Wisp moved towards me as if I was supposed to stop this interaction. My eyes drifted back to them, and I was surprised to see Cassius noticed me watching. He smirked like the smug prick he was. I went to leave because something was obviously going on with them.
“Excuse me. Can we help you?” Her voice held a cold unfriendly tone.
When I glanced back, Cassius’s golden eyes assessed me, waiting for my reaction.
“I came to speak to Cassius, but it wasn’t important.”
Her cold blue eyes narrowed on me. Her pretty face contorted with anger. Or was it possibly jealousy? Either way, this woman was pissed I was here and that I had interrupted whatever they were doing. Cassius’s face seemed annoyed by my presence, too, but that was usual.
“Do you know this woman?” She turned her hard stare at Cassius. His eyes left mine and he peered down at her with a smile that didn’t match the crabby attitude I always got from him.
“She is just a participant.” He dismissed me with the phrase. I don’t know why the dismissal pissed me off, but it did. It was clear they wanted me out of there, but I stood where I was unable to move because of anger and defiance. Her hand gripped his possessively, and my eyes narrowed at the touch. Cassius must have seen a look of disgust or jealousy because he gave me a knowing smile before stepping slightly away from the woman so her hand fell.
“Oh, how odd.” The woman turned her nose up at me. “A woman participant. How utterly un-lady-like and savage. Although I suppose I should have guessed by the atrocious clothing you're wearing.”
My eyes shifted to Cassius to see if he would tell his guest to quit being rude to me, but it was clear he would do nothing of the sort. The bastard smiled at her comment while staring me in the eyes. My clothing was rags compared to what she wore.
“It’s sad a family would send their daughter into this tournament. Did they not have a son, or did they simply want to get rid of you?” She gave me the fakest smile she could. Magic burned under my skin like it might explode. My fire wanted to escape and evaporate this woman in front of me. I could grab my dagger and kill her before she stopped smiling at me. My darkness hummed at the thought as if to tell me to do it. The Wisp flew towards the woman with black flames of anger. The Wisp rammed into the woman making her shift slightly like she sensed the attack. Her blonde hair blew up slightly from the Wisp. Cassius’ smile widened like he knew exactly what had happened.
“You should teach your friend some manners or put a gag in her mouth before letting her out in public.” I smiled back at her but spoke to him.
The man beside her was horrified but seemed truly entertained by the exchange. He smiled at me brightly. Cassius’s eyes were full of amusement at the reappearance of my attitude. Bored indifference painted my face, but the woman was turning red with anger.
“Do you know who I am? You should be bowing for forgiveness,” she hissed.
“If you have to tell someone how important you are, you aren’t that important.”
The blonde man laughed so loudly that I knew I had struck a nerve.
“Cassius, will you say something to her? This is embarrassing.” She started to fake sob as she latched onto his chest. He made no move to comfort her as his eyes found mine. They twinkled with something close to pride as a satisfied smile spread over his handsome face.
“Don’t worry. I’m leaving. I’ve got somewhere to be.” Instead of heading for the castle, I turned around and made my way out through the front gates, venturing into the depths of the forest. My fire was raging inside of me, and I needed to let it out somewhere safe. I ran through the thick forest until my lungs burned and sweat beaded down my back. The air was hotter the farther from the castle I got. The Wisp was waiting in a melancholy grey color when I met her in a clearing.
A pool of water stood so still the sky reflected in it. Gazing at my reflection cast in the water, I noticed my dark braid coming undone and my once vivid green eyes consumed by swirls of blackness. There was a faint scar running from my hairline over my eye and down my cheek. My skin was starting to glow with anger. That woman was so fucking rude, but what pissed me off more was Cassius’s dismissal of me. He let her be rude to me, and seemingly enjoyed the spectacle.
With that thought, I yelled and sent my fire into the pond. It ran freely from me and power like never before burst from me. Power pulsed through me so intensely that I realized how much magic I had. Could I burn down the whole forest if I were mad enough? It felt too good. An all-consuming need to know how powerful I was took over. This was the first opportunity I had to let my magic out freely. I was always cautious when out of Exile, but I didn’t care at this moment.
My power and energy were draining from me quickly as fire exploded from me. I screamed into the sky as if it would soothe this unnecessary rage in me. As my fire died, I sank onto the mossy shore of the pond. Exhaustion had me falling to my back. The bright blue sky was starting to change colors with the setting sun and the air was cooling off, but I couldn’t be bothered to move.
Besides the exhaustion of using my magic, I was tired in general. I had been fighting to survive for so long that I was utterly exhausted just to make it through the day. My thoughts drifted to Exile and how I missed Sybil and the twins. What were they doing right now? What would we do if I freed all of us? Maybe then I would seek out information about my past and who I was. Possibly even find my family. If I dared to dream, I hoped that maybe someone who loved me was waiting for me too.
My eyes fluttered closed as the warmth of the sun hit my face. Before heading back, I would have to rest. With that thought, I drifted into a deep sleep.
When I woke up, blackness surrounded me, but I found comfort in it. As my eyes adjusted to the dark, I stood up. With the uncertainty of the timing of the next trial looming, I knew I needed to hurry back to the castle. In a swift motion, I snapped my fingers, conjuring a ball of orange fire that hovered in my palm, illuminating the darkness that enveloped me.
Attempting to navigate my way back by following my footprints from earlier proved difficult. Distinguishing between my tracks and those left by animals was challenging in the dirt.
A long breath escaped me when the Wisp appeared next to me. Her soft blue flame was darker blue than normal, but I didn’t know what that meant. She floated in front of me and led me until the castle appeared in the distance, but as much as I knew I needed to be in the castle, there wasn’t a part of me that wanted to be here.
My reaction to Cassius and the woman made me wonder more about who I was before losing my memory. Somewhere deep inside I knew that I was treated poorly and the way that woman spoke to me today had triggered a past wound I couldn’t remember. The feeling of loneliness had always been a constant, but I was sure there was deep rooted wound from my past that caused it.
At times when I sat long enough in the silence, emotions and feelings familiar to me would bubble up. I enjoyed being alone and I enjoyed the silence. Perhaps I didn’t have a family or someone who loved me, but something would nag at me in the back of my mind like it knew that wasn’t true. The same nagging feeling happened every time I thought of not having a family. Someone out there knew I was gone. The true question was, did they care?
