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Calming is good, I think, growing increasingly nervous about seeing Joe again. I honestly can’t believe it’s only, what, twelve hours since we kissed? I only said goodbye to him at half past one this morning!
Here he comes, handsome in loose-fitting jeans and a deep green jumper. When he sees me he tips up his head in recognition. My pulse spikes, fingers fidget with the menu in front of me.
‘Hey,’ he says softly, sitting down opposite.
‘Hey,’ I repeat, stomach in knots.
We cycle through some small talk while we put our orders in. I’ve opted for the smoothie bowl, mostly because I figure something cleansing for breakfast might also help clear this brain fog I seem to be battling through? Joe goes for eggs Benedict.
Our coffees arrive decorated with coffee art hearts, which for some reason seems a step too far for me. I pick up my spoon and stir until the heart swirls and blurs.
Joe watches me closely.
‘We should probably talk about last night,’ he says.
‘Yes,’ I exhale.
‘I really like you, Sophie.’
‘I really like you too!’ I reply enthusiastically, relieved he doesn’t hate me for messing things up. ‘Our friendship means so much to me.’
Joe presses his lips together, briefly looking up to the ceiling before bringing his gaze back to me.
‘That’s not quite what I—’ he says.
‘The thing is,’ I’m also saying.
We both pause, waiting for the other person to carry on.
‘You go.’ Joe holds his palms up.
‘Okay,’ I say shakily as my phone pings in my bag. ‘Oh. I’d better just check that in case it’s from Mum, she’s still got Lila.’
There’s a message from an unknown number. I frown as I open it.
Sophie, it’s Mark. I’m in Bristol. Could we talk?
Not Mark my ex-husband, surely? The wishful thinking that this is no doubt some other Mark who knows my name and randomly wants to chat dissipates within seconds as he carries on typing.
Sorry, I know it’s a Sunday! Just wondered if you’d be free to catch up.
I’m on a train back to London at 2pm.
‘Sophie? You’ve gone white,’ Joe says.
I stare and stare at the messages. My hands shake as I set my phone down on the table. It’s been years since I have heard from my ex-husband. Years since I packed up my belongings and moved away from him for good. It wasn’t just the belongings, either. It was the life we’d made, the memories we’d created, the business we’d built. I boxed it all up neatly and pushed it to the far corners of my mind. I started afresh.
‘It’s Mark,’ I say, and even in my confusion I can see Joe’s face clouding over. ‘He wants to meet up. I knew from the moment we saw those Mylk It coffees at the school gates that something like this would happen, I just hoped it wouldn’t.’
‘What do you think he wants?’
I puff air out of my cheeks. ‘No idea. All I know is that I don’t like the fact that he’s here in my city. It makes me feel really uneasy, like alarm bells are ringing.’
‘That’s only natural,’ Joe says softly. ‘You’re feeling protective over Lila.’
I frown. ‘You’re right. It’s unsettling to think that he’s cropped up in our hometown.’
‘Look,’ he says, ‘I don’t want to hold you up. This can wait.’
