Page 112 of The Billionaire's Virgin

Palpation[Chapter Thirty-Two

Taylor

I had scoured the area. I had gone back to the park almost five times just to make sure that Sofia hadn’t doubled back with Jenna in tow. I knew that she wouldn’t be in the area. Instinct told me that she was long gone, but for some reason, I couldn’t bring myself to abandon the site.

The guilt was so great that there were moments I felt like I could choke on it. My palms were sweaty, my heart was racing, and I felt like I was running out of time. The worst part was the fact that my eyes and ears were playing tricks on me. I was so hyped up with fear and worry that I kept seeing Jenna everywhere. I heard a laugh that sounded like hers, and I turned in the direction of the sound hoping to see her face. I saw a little head of dark hair, and my heart jumped in the belief that I had found her.

Twice I had made the same mistake. I saw a child walking hand in hand with a tall blonde woman who looked like she had a firm grip on the little girl. I ran after them screaming Jenna’s name, but it wasn’t until I had shoved into the blonde woman that she had turned around.

And when she did, I saw not the face that plagued me, but a stranger with features only subtlety similar to that of Sofia’s.

“Excuse me?” she said, looking at me with anger and irritation.

“I’m sorry,” I gasped. “I thought… you looked like… I’m sorry.”

I looked down at the child and realized she was older than Jenna. This little girl was probably seven or eight. Apart from the dark hair, she looked nothing like Jenna. I had been duped by my own fear again.

“Come on, Ally,” the woman said, dragging the child away from me. “Let’s go. Don’t look back.”

“What do you think she wanted, Mama?” the child asked.

“Who knows?” the woman replied. “This city has all kinds of weirdos.”

On another day, I would have bristled at the word. But today, it barely even touched me. I just turned my back on them and continued to look for Jenna. Reed had called me a bunch of times, trying to coax me back to the apartment, but how could I go back without Jenna? It felt wrong. I knew that I needed to find her first. I had promised him that I would search one more time and then return, but I knew it was a lie even as I spoke it. I just needed him to get off the phone so that I could go back to searching for her.

I found myself back at the playground again. The swings and the jungle gym were practically empty now. All the parents and kids who had been around when Jenna was taken had left for their homes immediately, as though they felt that kidnapping was contagious, and if they stuck around long enough, their children would become victims as well.

I didn’t blame them. I would have done the same thing in their position. If another child had been taken, I would have grabbed Jenna and taken her back to the safety of the apartment… where no one could touch us. There were a few new faces. A mother with two young children and a nanny with a little boy who was climbing the jungle gym while she looked on, imploring him to be careful.

I surveyed the space around me, but every so often my eyes would fall back to the children in the playground and their caretakers. Nothing in their lives had changed. The world was the same for them as it had been this morning. They would finish playing and head back to their homes and their lives. But for me… what would be my fate?

It felt entirely possible that I would spend my entire life coming back to this playground, searching for her face among the other children if the police didn’t find her. I gasped inwardly at that thought. Could it be possible that they might never find her? Was that actually a possibility? It felt like some kind of nightmarish reality that fit in with my life.

I could feel tears prick at the back of my eyes and this time I didn’t even bother to prevent myself from crying. Crying was the only thing I could do now. I didn’t feel any shame in doing it publicly either. I was past caring at this point.

“Taylor?”

I swing around to find Lily staring at me with somber eyes. “What are you doing here?” I asked.

“I dropped Millie off at my mother’s place,” she said. “And I thought… I just wanted to see how you were.”

“How did you know I would be here?”

“It’s what I would do if I were in your position,” Lily said quietly.

I felt a tear slip free, and I wanted to scream. “I keep coming back thinking she’ll have miraculously reappeared. I keep thinking I’ll turn and she’ll be playing in the sandbox.”

“You should go home, Taylor.”

“I can’t go home without her.”

“Where’s Reed?” Lily asked.

“At the apartment,” I replied.

“How… is he?” Lily asked, and I could tell she wasn’t sure whether she should be asking the question or not.

“He’s terrified,” I replied. “He’s angry; he’s frustrated…. he’s desperate. And he’s angry a couple more times.”