AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I dial Sarah’s number and she picks up on the second ring. “Hey, what are you up to?”
“Just about to turn on a movie for the kids so I can get dinner started. What’s going on?”
“You want some help?” I reply. “The girls are kind of restless waiting for their dad to come home. I think they need some play time.”
“Sure. Come on over. You can help me debone a chicken.”
“That sounds like a threat.”
She laughs. “See you in a few.”
Sarah has been my closest friend for about two years, since Mila and I attended Mommy and Me classes when she was a baby. I was always the type to have few close friends and many acquaintances. In college, Adam was my closest friend, until I fucked that up when I cheated on him with Nathan. Then Nathan became my best friend, until he died while surfing during a storm in California. Now Adam is my best friend again, and not having any siblings of my own, Sarah comes about as close to a sister as I imagine I could get.
I gather the girls into the SUV, their excitement bubbling over when they hear we’re going to Aunt Sarah’s house so they can play with nine-year-old Ginnie and four-year-old Caden.
Mila asks the most adorable question as I pull the car out of the driveway. “Is Daddy gonna play with Caden, too?”
“No, baby. Daddy will be home later. You and Kaia are going to play with Caden.”
“Daddy doesn’t like Caden?”
I try not to laugh at this response. “Daddy likes Caden, but Daddy won’t be home until later tonight. He’s coming home right before you go to sleep, so he’ll be there to give you a big hug and a kiss. Okay?”
“And a chicken? The chicken crossed the road to the side, and he… and he…”
“Duh. That’s not how it goes,” Kaia interjects.
“Kaia, don’t take that tone. Your sister’s still learning how to tell jokes.”
“I was just trying to correct her, gosh. I can’t wait till Dad gets home. You have too many hormones.”
“What?” I shriek. “Don’t talk to me like that, young lady. Where did you learn that?”
“That’s what Dad always says,” she grumbles. “Why is it okay for him to say it?”
I shake my head as I turn onto the main road. “Because he’s an adult and he knows what that means and you don’t. I don’t have too many hormones.” I take a deep breath as I stop at a red light. “When a woman is pregnant, her hormone levels change to accommodate the baby. It’s natural and it’s not something you use as an insult. Do you understand me?” I say, looking in the rearview mirror to see her face.
She rolls her eyes. “I don’t understand why adults get to say things that kids can’t. They’re just words. Daddy always says the F-word.”
“Fuck!” Mila cries out with glee, and if I weren’t already at a stoplight, I would have slammed on my brakes.
“Mila, no! You’re not allowed to say that word. You’re not watching any Belle the Builder for the rest of the week.”
“No, Mommy, nooooooo!” she squeals.
I grit my teeth as the symphony of Mila’s whining protest in the backseat grows louder by the second. I don’t know how I’m going to do this with four kids if Adam decides not to retire. I’m a terrible mother.
A hundred years ago, women like my great-grandmother had ten kids and most of them managed to survive well into their golden years. Nowadays, we need nannies, play groups, tutors, electronic babysitters. I’ve never hired a nanny for the girls, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t entertained the notion. Imagine that: a stay-at-home mother needing a nanny to take care of her two children who have no special needs. I’m a terrible mother.
On top of that, I’m not a very good wife. I know how difficult it will be for Adam to give up competing at a professional level. And if Kaia weren’t going to school in Wilmington now, we’d be traveling the world with him without complaint. But I really don’t think it’s wrong for me to want him home more than half of the year.
Maybe it is. Maybe I’m being selfish. Or maybe I’m saving him from the crushing regret of wishing he’d been there more for the kids. Or maybe I’m just trying to save myself from the regret of wishing I’d been able to convince him to be there for them.
After driving around for ten minutes without Mila’s tantrum abating in the least bit, I decide to turn around and head home. She just woke from a nap less than two hours ago, and she’s still throwing a hissy fit, which means she’s not really upset about having her favorite TV program taken away from her for a week. She just wants her dad. She always gets especially mouthy and defiant at the tail end of a long absence from her father.
I call Sarah to let her know we can’t make it, though I make up an excuse that Adam is coming home earlier than expected. Pretty pathetic when you start lying to make your life look better.
“That’s wonderful. I’ll bet he’s dying to see you and the girls,” Sarah replies, and I can hear the sound of pots clattering in the background.
“Yeah, these long competitions are difficult… on all of us, especially with two babies on the way. I’m… kind of worried,” I say, trying to sneak a bit of truth into my lie, but something tells me Sarah’s smart enough to sort out the tangled truth on her own. Though, I don’t mention that I’ve noticed some strangely flirty exchanges between Adam and Lena lately. She’ll just chalk this up to paranoia, which it probably is.
“Lindsay, I hope you don’t mind me saying this, but it’s okay to ask your husband to spend more time with his kids. That doesn’t make you a bitch or a nag. For fuck’s sake, you’re going to have four chitlins running around soon. You can’t raise those little fuckers on your own.”
I laugh out loud at this gloriously foul advice. Sarah always seems to know what to say and exactly how to say it. “Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind when these two little fuckers come out.”
“You said fucker!” Kaia yells at me as I pull into the driveway.
“Sarah, I have to go. I have a couple of children to drown in my bathtub.”
“Good luck!”
Eight
I sigh as I dial Lindsay’s cell phone. I’m not looking forward to making this phone call. The line rings once… twice… three times…
“What’s wrong? Where are you?”
“Baby, my flight was canceled. You can check the website to verify it. I’m stuck in DFW for the night.”
“What about Lena and Yuri?”
“They got bumped onto a different flight, but there were only two seats left. I didn’t want to split them up so I let them have the seats.”
“But…”
She sighs heavily into the phone. “Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“That’s it?”
“Well, what do you want me to say? That the girls are going to be really disappointed? That they’ve been talking about nothing but Daddy all day long? I know you don’t want to hear that. So let’s just drop it and I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Fuck,” I whisper as I step onto the Skylink rail line to Terminal D. “I really wanted to be there. I miss you and the girls so much.”
“I know,” she says, her voice trailing off. “Just get some rest, ’cause these girls are gonna attack you when you get here.”
“In that case, you’d better get some rest too, because I’m gonna attack you when I get home.”
She lets out a weak laugh. “Heh. We’ll see about that. I’ve gained six pounds since you left, and it hasn’t even been two weeks.”
“Holy shit. Is it all baby or are you packing some junk in your trunk?”
“I think it’s part baby and part boob.”
“Mmm… Even better.” The train slows down as we get closer to the stop for Terminal D. “I’ll call you when I get to the room. And I promise I’ll make it up to you tomorrow.”
Once I’m settled into a suite at the Grand Hyatt, I call my dad to ask how things are going with the addition project. Parker Construction has been the family business for more than a hundred years. My dad has been running the company since before I was born. Once upon a time, I was expected to take over so my dad could retire, but I had other plans. And my dad’s only fifty-nine years old. He’s got plenty of years in him yet. Not to mention that my cousin Locke seems to be ready to assume the throne the minute my dad checks out.
Parker Construction doesn’t usually do home renovations, unless it’s a family project. And the downside to that is that my dad still has to prioritize his manpower for the important government projects. That means sometimes our little bedroom addition project gets sidelined so he can send his guys out on a real job. But my dad has been generous with us, so I don’t complain. We’re only paying for labor and materials, so we’re saving about forty grand right there. Plus, I know that the job is getting done right because my dad won’t allow his guys to cut any corners where his grandchildren are involved.
