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I looked down at where half my shirt was untucked and I seemed to be missing a button or two. “First time for everything. Thanks for helping.”
“I’m gonna be banned from their shows now, huh?”
“Nah, they’ll get over it.”
I looked over to where Viper had Halo in his arms. It seemed like the anger was still there, but neither of them were making a move to go after the others, so that was a win in my book.
Relationships. That was what caused ninety-five percent of issues within every damn band on the planet. Who was fucking who, who wasn’t, who was with who, who was left out…it was exhausting. It was yet another reason I’d shied away from ever getting involved with anyone after Jonny.
But no, I’d thrown every logical thought out the window with Killian’s sweet talk and with what I’d thought was genuine interest, backed up by genuine actions.
I’d been a fool. Slade and Jagger were fools too. They knew Halo’s sister was off-limits, but of course a challenge was exactly what guys like them wanted.
“This,” I said, standing up so I could glare at Halo and Viper. When they looked up, I shook my head and started to pace. “This is why inter-band relationships don’t work. It’s messy as hell. Nothing lasts forever, so when it all comes crashing down, guess what happens? It all goes to shit. Everything you’ve worked so hard for destroyed because no one can keep it in their goddamn pants.”
Halo blinked at me. Viper raised his brow.
“You think you can make it work now, but when are you all going to understand it never works. Huh?” When no one answered—not that I expected them to—I went on. “You’re on borrowed time. This? It never lasts. It can’t. Temptation is fucking everywhere, there’s always some new shiny toy to play with, and then the next thing you know, you’re tossed aside. Forgotten.” I stopped, the realization I’d gone too far crossing my mind. I’d veered into personal territory, put my fears on the one couple that probably would make it if anyone could.
I let out a deep sigh, one that spoke of how damn mentally exhausted I was.
“Nice speech,” Viper said. “Is that why you’re running?”
“What?” I reared back, Viper’s words slapping me in the face. “I’m not running.”
How could I run from something Killian didn’t even want? It made no sense.
Viper shrugged, but his eyes were all too knowing. “Sure, Levi. You keep telling yourself that.”
Thirty-Six
Killian
WE’D BEEN BACK in New York for two days when I decided forty-eight hours was enough time for Levi to get over the jet lag and, hopefully, be open enough to give me a chance to explain.
I was still recovering from the plane ride from hell, the extremely tense trip from Brisbane to L.A. to New York. No one had said a word to each other the entire time, but if looks could kill, we would all be dead. I, for one, was just grateful we’d made it back to the States in one piece. Everyone needed a few days to cool off, but I felt confident that when the fires burned out, we’d all be able to come together and laugh it off.
Well, I felt reasonably confident about that.
With my hands in my pockets, I strolled down Wooster Street, toward Levi’s place in Soho. I’d never actually been there before; we’d always had meetings at my place, which seemed to be the general gathering spot for the band. But Levi had mentioned enough about the area he lived in that it didn’t take a genius to do some snooping and find out his exact address.
I came to a stop in front of the long, cream-colored doors. I wasn’t sure if I’d even walk inside past them, because there was a huge chance Levi wouldn’t ask me up when I hit the buzzer for his apartment. But seeing as he still wouldn’t answer or return my calls, I had to give it a shot.
Blowing out a breath, I walked over to the intercom and glanced at the short list of names. There he was: L. Walker, Apt. 3B
Here goes nothin’.
The front door of the building burst open beside me as someone walked out, and I didn’t hesitate. I darted inside before it closed and headed up the three flights of stairs.
Good. I was already inside, so at least I wouldn’t be standing on the street if Levi decided not to hear me out.
As I reached the third floor, I stopped, catching my breath. Not from exertion, but from the nerves suddenly flooding my system. If any of the guys could see me now, I thought, almost laughing to myself. Not such a badass, am I?
I cracked my neck from side to side and steeled myself as I headed toward 3B. He’ll understand. He’ll listen, it’ll all work out, and then we can laugh this off too.
