This was a part of Antonias’s life that he’d locked away and never spoke of. It was an unspoken understanding that Antonias’s past was never to be the topic of anyone’s discussion. He buried it so deeply that even I didn’t think his past had any bearings on his emotions.
Seeing this gesture, I knew Antonias was inviting me into a place that was sacred even if it was the worst and scariest time of his life. With unshed tears, I closed the locket, then placed the expensive piece around my neck.
Climbing from bed, I felt like I was climbing from one cloud to another. I breezed through my morning routine, moisturized, and dressed for my first Christmas on the farm. The house smelled like Christmas as I left the room. Hearing voices from the same people who’d been nearly about to kill each other last night coming from the living room, my steps quickened.
Inside the living room, Adir, Adrian, and my father were on the couch talking and carrying on like nothing happened lastnight. Jessie laid quietly sleeping on Adrian’s lap. I could hear Coco and my mama in the kitchen. I hugged my brothers; a silent apology wafted between the three of us. Then, I hugged my father. The whole situation with me getting shot put a few more gray hairs in his beard.
Leaving them on the couch, I sought out Antonias. He was inside the dining room sitting at the table with Kwamé. Whatever they were talking about ceased when I entered. Antonias’s eyes dropped to the necklace he’d gifted me, and his gaze found mine again. I blushed and offered him a shy smile.
“I’ll give you two some privacy,” Kwamé said as she stood from the table.
Before she walked out of the dining room, I asked her, “What happened between you and Katrelle?”
She sighed. “While you and Coco were trying to keep Adir and Adrian from jumping on Antonias—”
I groaned and Antonias chuckled.
“—I was talking to Katrelle.”
Glancing at Kwamé, I quipped, “Talking, sis? You were on her back.”
“I wanted to know how she knew, too. She said she saw you that night. She saw how badly you were injured and knew there was no way you should’ve even survived the wounds.”
Blinking back tears, I nodded. “Oh.” Antonias told the truth. I avoided eye contact with him and quizzed Kwamé. “So, how did you end up on Katrelle’s back?”
“Well…” She sheepishly shrugged. “Her mouth got slick, and I had to pop her in it.”
Grinning, I said, “That sounds about right.” We hugged, and then she left me to deal with Antonias.
I stood by the entrance of the dining room, admiring how lovely he looked sitting at the well-made table. A red tablecloth covered the large rectangular table topped with fine dishes, freshcolorful flowers from the farm’s garden, and three tall burning candles, emanating the scent of gingerbread.
“Good mornin’,” he drawled, then wet his lips with his tongue.
“Hey,” I replied.
“You gon’ come here?”
Smiling, I went to my man and straddled his lap. Running my fingers through the thick curls on top of his head as I kissed his lips was exactly how I wanted to start our day every morning.
“Merry Christmas.”
“Same to you,” I responded.
He touched the locket and said, “You like it?”
“Actually, I love it,” I uttered. His eyes softened and an equally soft expression covered his face. Whatever journey we were about to take, I was wholeheartedly sticking beside him.
CHAPTER 12
ANTONIAS
Takingpicturesinfrontof the Christmas tree with the people I considered family caused an emotion akin to longing to well up inside me. Since talking to Kwamé, I longed to bring Uriah peace. For the majority of my life, he stayed dormant, hidden behind my well-built brick wall that was my career and the family I’d found along the way. My career kept me too busy to recall the trauma of my childhood. My found family were as close as any blood relative could ever be. These were people I’d kill for and die for. These were people who respected me enough to never speak on the shit they knew about my childhood. Adirwas the only one who knew the full extent of who Uriah was, and even he respected my fucking boundaries.
When it came to Bianca, she said that she loved me. However, she knew Antonias, the doctor, the family friend, and even the charismatic playboy. She didn’t knowme. That was my fault, though. I wouldn’t feel truly free in our relationship without her knowing everything about me. Even the horrible shit.
With the New Year approaching, I wanted to enter it with a fresh slate not just for Bianca, but for myself too. Going back to Miami for anything other than business was already stressing me the fuck out. It was something I had to do, though. Hopefully, I wouldn’t crash out too badly.
While in the middle of a few more pictures, the front door opened. Cooley, Auntie Maddie, Heir, and Maja filed inside. A round of greetings and hugs went around. Genesis took one look at the ten-foot-tall tree with flashing lights, large and small ornaments, trinkets of every kind, and a mountain of gifts underneath it, and tripped trying to get to it. His little legs couldn’t carry him as fast as he wanted to go.
