The vendors were keen.
My offer was snapped up with the help from my lawyer who negotiated a lower amount because of the work that needs doing.
I owe her a lot.
As time goes on, we all feel freer and it feels like I’m able to finally catch a breath.
“Are we going to talk about it?”
I knew this moment would come. Noah always knew he wasn’t Malcolm’s. Malcolm made sure of it. But I rebuffed my son every single time he wanted to talk about his biological father.
“I …”
“Mum. Please. Don’t you think I’ve waited long enough?”
I nod. “I know. Just … give me a minute.”
He sits on the other end of the sofa—so close, and yet so far away.
Noah is my pride and joy. I love all my children fiercely, but he’s the one who was born out of love, not abuse and obligation.
“I love you. I’ve loved you from the moment you were born, but I also had to protect you.” I meet his gaze—so much like his father’s. “You know all this.”
“But my father. He’s here?”
My throat tightens. “He is.”
“So, can’t we?—?”
“No.” I run my fingers through my hair. “Not yet. I need some time to prepare. Do you understand what a big deal this is?”
“It’s a big deal for me too.”
He’s frustrated—I know that.
Tears prick my eyes. “I know. But I’ve been living with this for so long, and you know what we’ve all been through. I just need a little time. I love you, Noah, but I need you to do this for me.”
His jaw sets. “Fine.”
“I’ll do it. But I want to do it on my own timeline. You of all people know how much there is still for us to do. Once we’re moved, the kids need to be settled, which means all those little things we need to get done around the house have to be done.”
I take a step forward and grasp his arm. “I know you’re a grown man, and you can do it yourself if you want to, but I’m asking you to do this my way. When he finds out, I don’t know how he’s going to react. I need to be stronger.”
He swallows hard. “You think he’ll be angry?”
“Wouldn’t you be? I’ve kept this from him for twenty-seven years. He’s missed every single part of your upbringing.”
“I never really understood that. You could have contacted him?—”
My eyes fill with tears. “I had no way of contacting him at first. And then the others were born …”
He nods. We’ve had this conversation—he knows why I couldn’t do anything.
“My head felt like it was in a constant mess. You’re old enough to remember what it was like. We were cut off from the outside world. It wasn’t until we left the church that I could contact him, but?—”
“I get it, Mum. You had more to risk than me.”
“When Malcolm announced we were leaving, I thought we had nothing. I was in a panic over having a roof over our heads and putting food on the table. But he lied to the church.”
