Suyai feels like a part of that. Her consistent personality, her observations, and analysis fall into line with ours, and her constant presence before we left for Cusco means we don’t have to pretend around her.
“Try me,” Suyai says with a raised eyebrow, and I wonder if she’s fallen into a sense of comfort around us too. We haven’t hurt her since the incident with Tutay. We even healed her, though that decision remains unspoken between all of us.
But we know she’s kept her mental shields up from Izhi’s probing effortlessly, partially due to her own Ave mimicry. She doesn’t realize we have a different trick up our sleeve this time.
Izhi shrugs their shoulders and nods at me.
It’s been three days since I tried to contact Cashan. I didn’t try to contact him last night after we returned. Partially because I didn’t want my feelings to seep into our bond and partially to prepare for this moment. Trying to communicate with him every night was draining me more than I imagined. With how deeply I was pushing myself, I was losing samay faster than I’d ever experienced.
But now I’m stronger.
It’s okay now.It’s okay, I mouth to myself. Suyai is our most valuable treasure. I don’t want to think about how that’s equivalent to her being our desperate last hope. I don’t want to think about the ticking clock on Cashan’s health, or how far he’s gone. I want to feel hope for once. The same type of hope he would fill us with when we all came together.
“Get her ready, will you?” Tutay shouts from across the room. Pucaru grumbles about being ordered around but does as she says. Yes, we’re almost back to normal.
And it’s all thanks to Suyai.
Suyai looks confused as Pucaru surrounds her with pillows and linens, all stolen from around the palace. It’s not a comfort we’ve ever allowed anyone else, but it feels like an appropriate way to thank her.
We all stare at her like she’s made of gold, though she’s worth so much more.
“She’s all grown up,” Tutay says, and I’m sure she meant for it to sound meaner than it did. Her voice holds more curiosity than mal-intent, just like all of ours would if we were to break out of our trance and speak.
It’s odd seeing someone you last saw as a young child in the Apukispay’s head show up in front of you a day later, all grown up. She’s a plain-looking girl. The only noticeable thing about her is the few strands of white in her hair, indicating the use of mimicry. Her stony face ages her, but she still looks 19 or 20 if I had to guess.
“What are you talking abou–”
She’s knocked unconscious before she can finish her sentence. As I prepare myself to enter her head, I compare the girl motionless in front of me to the images from the Apukispay’s head.
The Apukispay’s thoughts were sharp. Sinchinrei, her daughter, four years old and stumbling as she ran, little Suyai chasing behind her and screaming at her towait for me. Sinchinrei, 12 years old and beaming as she receives the highest honor at the army entrance exams. She takes her medal and runs into the cheering crowd of her new colleagues, Suyai trying to reach for her hand in between the writhing bodies. Sinchinrei, of age, dropped to the floor. A cough that spoke of pain. Her voice broken, a raw whisper, begging.Suyai. Suyai of the Inka’s army. The detached feeling of worry and disappointment all mixed inside the Apukispay’s head. The detached feeling of resentment. That is the strongest memory the Apukispay had of Sinchinrei. It is what stuck in her mind after she heard Sinchinrei’s voice at Korikancha. She heard the girl speak and remembered how she, the Guardians’ Hero, sounded at her weakest.
She is Sinchinrei’s weakness, and she’s in our control.
I lie down beside her, getting comfortable on the pillows. This won’t take long.
I close my eyes, and I’m in her head.
“Sinchinrei,” I say into the dark abyss of the Serpent’s domain. I feel out the name on my tongue and say it two more times before Suyai’s subconscious responds.
“They’re alive. They have to be alive. Mare and Rei have to be alive,” her thoughts echo around me. There’s a new name.Mare.
“Is Mare okay?” I ask.
“Mare always looks more okay than he is. Rei’s too blind to see it. With the princess, even more so. He’s just a little kid, just like she was.”
“You’re in love with her,” I say as a fact. I don’t know why I say it other than I want to see how her mind will react.
No words come, but her feelings are chaotic enough to overwhelm me. They overtake all my senses. They’re a nonstop deluge, a whirlpool, the pressure of being at the bottom of the sea.
Then, as soon as it starts, it stops.
Her mind completely clears.
Control. Suyai is well-versed in strict control. I just need to know one more thing.
“Does she love you back?”
I brace myself for the emotional whiplash, but nothing comes. I only hear Suyai’s steady voice.
