I can’t force the words out.
I don’t deserve it.
To feel this way about her.
To let the world know.
To have any sort of claim on her as mine.
Even though there’s nothing more I desire.
All that’s left for me, what I can do, is worship her at a distance so I don’t taint and ruin her.
She’s the only thing that’s good in this life.
I watch the monastery from afar for a while.
Phoenix doesn’t want me with her on this path.
Your only duty is dying for me when the time comes.
I would gladly do it, over and over again.
An idea forms in my head then.
There’s something I can do, even if she doesn’t want me with her.
I can find Vera and bring her back.
If I can’t stand at Nix’s side…
I’ll make sure she has something to come back to once she returns to Jaakii with her dragon.
I squeeze Midnight’s sides and urge the horses forward.
Once I’m closerto the monastery, Monk Ren and some others rush outside. Even Elder Arcon appears.
The disappointment and worry that grows on their faces when they realize I’m alone makes my heart stutter.
“Blood Sentineal,” Elder Arcon greets me when I arrive. His wise gaze doesn’t waver. “You come back alone. Where’s the General?”
I swallow a ball lodged in my throat and dismount.
Right then, Phoenix’s Ezkai appear through the front door. Ravenna frowns when she sees me alone. Ezkai Bjorn’s face hardens.
“She lives,” I say, facing Elder Arcon. “We have found the dragon. She—she’s tracking it to its den. Alone. She believes it’s her path to walk alone.”
I keep Elder Arcon’s gaze. But it’s not easy.
The way he looks at me…it’s as if he sees right through me.
The old monk nods. “It is, indeed.”
Not everyone reacts as calmly as Elder Arcon.
I don’t see it coming.
My head whips to the side as Bjorn’s fist connects with my jaw.
