Reluctantly, I turned on my phone and erased all the missed calls, voicemails, and text messages from Kill, not at all emotionally prepared to hear from him. He needed to realize his happiness was more important to me than my selfish desires.
I pressed the speed dial for my dad's number, wanting to get this part over with. Martha answered, and I was unsure whether I should be relieved or not, but I forged forward anyway.
“Hey, sweetie. What are you doing? Are you excited your man's coming home tomorrow?”
My heart lurched in my chest, but I blocked out the pain, refusing to let it flood through my system like poison. “Actually, that's why I called you. I need your help.”
Martha sighed on the other end of the line. My voice sounded miserable, and I was positive she had picked up on it.
“What happened?” she asked.
“I'll tell you, but I’ll need your help telling my dad. I don't want to cast Kill in a bad light, either,” I rambled. I couldn't handle my dad thinking any less of Kill. It wouldn't be fair to cause my dad to lose the respect Kill had fought so hard to earn.
“I'll help you with your dad. Tell me what happened."
I launched into the story of what had happened that morning. It was hard to believe it had all occurred only hours ago. My body felt like it had been dealing with the aftermath for weeks. I gave her the edited version, just like I’d done with Jessie and Ryan. But the summary was the truth, and every word ripped me to shreds.
“Oh, sweetie. I'm so sorry. I'm not going to tell you what to do, because you obviously feel it was the right path for you. I love you like a daughter, and as long as you can live with your choice, I'll be there for you. And if you change your mind, I'll be there to conspire with you.”
I was shocked when a laugh bubbled from my lips. My heart expanded at her words, realizing she really was family. “I love you too, Martha. You're the closest thing I’ve ever had to a mom, and I need your support more than you know. I also wanted to ask if it would be okay if I moved in for a while after graduation?”
“Of course, sweetie. You don’t have to ask, and don’t worry about your dad. I'll take care of it. Do you want us to get you a plane ticket, or do you want to drive home?”
“I want to drive. That way I don’t have to make a trip back later for my car. Thank you so much, Martha.”
“Hush. You just stay sane until we get there in a couple of days. When you get home, we'll get you all patched up.”
I stroked the tattoo'd mended heart on my wrist. Staring down as I felt the puckered skin where my scar was now covered. Seeing the repaired heart gave me the confidence boost I needed. I had survived before; I would do it again.
“Thanks, Martha. I'll talk to you later, and will see you soon. I love you.”
“Love you too, sweetie.”
I hung up, feeling a tiny bit better about my situation. I put my phone on my stomach and closed my eyes, falling asleep immediately. Later, my phone buzzed on my stomach where I’d placed it.
Trent’s number flash across the screen, and my heart cracked open even further. It wasn't right to be upset it wasn't Kill calling. I’d pushed him away.
“Faith, are you alright?” Trent asked when I answered.
I didn't understand the worry in his voice, and I wondered briefly if he’d somehow found out about Kill and I. “Yeah, why?” I asked. I was trying to go for nonchalant until I could figure out exactly what he knew.
“I went to see you at work tonight, since it’s the last night beforehecomes back.”
My stomach burned with anger at the way he’d said he, but I ignored it.
“When I didn’t see you, I asked Jessie where you were. She told me you were probably screwing up someone else’s relationship, whatever that means. Anyway, I drove by your house and didn’t see your car. I was worried about you.”
The urge to call Jessie and scream at her for being so immature was overwhelming. She would never see reason though, so there would be no point in calling her on it.
“I’m fine,” I said. I crossed my fingers, hoping I could avoid any type of explanation. Shame surged through me when I realized I was planning on moving away without telling him. “Listen, Trent. I broke it off with Kill this morning and put in my resignation at Ray’s. I'll be graduating at the end of this week, anyway, so there really was no reason to stay.”
“I knew that asshole was going to hurt you. Where are you? I’ll come get you.” The glee in his voice was not lost on me.
“No, I'm safe, and it wasn’t Kill’s fault. I'm the one who hurt him. I'm staying at a friend’s house until graduation, and then I'm moving back in with my dad and Martha.”
“It's for the best, Faith. You deserve so much better, and I'll be here for you when you're ready. I think you and I would make a... Wait; what do you mean you're moving?”
His refusal to listen to me was infuriating. I’d told him on numerous occasions we would never be anything but friends, but his inability to accept my stance was borderline ridiculous.
