Gwenna smirks, like she almost enjoys his being flustered. Which: hard relate. “You’re fine,” she says to him, her voice a little thick with sleep. “Thanks for being…warm.”
Cal blushes.
“Well, this is…” I cast around for something to say, hands in my pockets, and then all the words come catapulting out at once. “You ever have that dream where you open a door and behind it is everyone you’ve ever kissed and they stare at you as soon as you open it and you realize they were, like, comparing notes? Because this is a lot like…”
I trail off.
“What?” Gwenna says, at the same time as Cal says “No.”
“Oh.” My face gets hot. “Well, um, me neither.”
Stupid thing to say. God, what if they actually start comparing notes? I don’t think I’ll survive. Almost panicked, I look back at Gwenna, but she’s got a…calculating expression on her face.
“I said, I don’t have anything to compare it to.”
“What?” At first I genuinely don’t understand, like she misspoke or left out a word. And then I realize.
That was Gwenna’s first kiss.
Iwas Gwenna’s first kiss.
“Oh, Jesus,” I mutter.
“Oh, Jesus is right,” Gwenna says.
A long, awkward moment passes.
“Can I…make it up to you?”
As soon as the question flies out of my mouth, I regret it.Can I make itupto you?I repeat in my mind, incredulous. God, I want to smack myself in the forehead. How, exactly? What does that even mean?
But Gwenna pauses.
She darts her eyes from me to Cal to me again. “Hm.”
I don’t like the sound of thathm.“Hm what?” I ask, leaning forward a little.
“Just…doing math.” She looks back at Cal.
“Math?” he says.
“You’ve kissed him…” She traces a finger through the air from Cal to me. “And he’s kissed me...” She points at her own chest.
“But you haven’t kissed him,” I finish for her. She glares at me.
“It’s just…interesting. I guess.”
Ah, okay. I’m picking up what she’s putting down.
“Kiss her,” I tell Cal.
Cal almost falls off the bed in shock. “What?”
Gwenna, for her part, goes ghost-white and starts to stammer. “I—you—I didn’t…”
It occurs to me I maybe miscalculated.
“Is that not what you wanted?” I say.
