Page 92 of Before I Lost You

“I know, baby,” Kenneth pants. “I need to see your face when I make you come.”

My eyes squeeze shut as he pounds into me—deeper, harder, faster. Like he’s trying to fuck the cum out of me as forcefully as possible. And fuck, I love it. I force myself to open my eyes, though, wanting to look at his face when he comes. His eyes are already trained on my face, the blush on his cheeks deepening as his lips part and he moans. He’s close, I can tell. He’ssoclose.

“I n-need—” Ken stutters. “Touch yourself. Come for me. I’m almost there—”

I wrap my hand around my cock, jerking it fast, matching the pace of his thrusts. I feel the telltale signs of my impending release, and my body tightens as raw pleasure crashes into me. My hole clamps down on Kenneth’s cock, and cum splatters all over my chest and neck. I’m moaning so loudly I’m sure the entire fucking building can hear it, but all I can focus on is Ken’s face. His eyes are wide, lips parted, pace turning frantic. He’s uncoordinated now.

“Yes,” I moan. “Just like that, Ken. Come inside me. I need it.”

Kenneth’s eyes roll to the back of his head just as I feel the rush of his release warming my insides. My legs fall from his shoulders, sliding towards his arms, and he lowers himself until we’re flush, burying his face into the crook of my neck as his thrusts slow down.

“Oh, god,” he whispers, kissing my neck softly. “I knew that was going to be incredible. I fucking dreamed of it. But nothing compares to the actual thing.”

I grin so wide my cheeks hurt. “I loved every second of it.”

“I love you,” Ken replies. “I love you more than anything.”

“I love you too, Kenny.” I run my hand down his spine, and he shivers. “I’ll love you forever.”

“Tell me what you want,” he says.

“To stay,” I whisper. He pulls away from my neck and looks down at me, frowning. Visibly confused. “I just want to stay this time.”

“You can stay here for as long as you want.” I can tell he doesn’t really know what else to say, but I’m grateful for his answer anyway. “Always.”

I swallow hard and nod, which makes him frown. He pulls out carefully, then gets up and disappears into the bathroom. A minute later, he’s coming back with a washcloth, which he uses to clean me up. I get under the covers as he goes to put it in the hamper, wondering how I got so lucky to have another chance with him. I’ve never loved anyone this much. Never needed anyone the way I need him. Waking up in that hospital room without him, knowing he didn’t know who I was, is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me. I don’t know what the future holds, but I know I can’t go through that again.

Kenneth joins me in bed, sliding beside me and getting so close our bodies are flush. I lie on my back to let him put his head on my chest, and he tangles our legs together. Just like that, I’m at peace once more. And when his hand finds mine, I smile and grip it tightly, holding on for dear life.

I’m going to hold on just like this forever.

Chapter 36

EVERYTHING EXCEPT GOODBYE

It’s been a long fucking day, and I’m exhausted. But I still go back to my penthouse and pack a bag, replacing the dirty clothes I’ve been wearing at Kenneth’s apartment. The place that feels like home now.Thisplace feels like a closet at this point. I don’t spend any time here, and I don’t want to. I hurry up and pack, mostly because Ken asked me to. He said there’s something urgent he wants to talk about, and that makes me even more nervous. The thought of him breaking up with me crosses my mind, making me feel sick, but then I remember he asked me to pack enough clothes for a week at the very least. If he wanted to break up with me, he wouldn’t want me to stay. So I take a deep breath and shake my head, effectively telling my brain to be quiet and focus on the task at hand.

My phone rings, and it’s my boss’s name on the screen. I’m tempted to ignore it, but he never calls me. So I take a deep breath and answer, my hands shaking, even though I’m not entirely sure why.

“Moore,” I say when I answer, then hold my breath.

“Yes, Mr. Moore.” Duncan, my boss, says. “I was going to talk to you after work today, but you seemed to be in a rush.”

“Oh, I didn’t know you needed me, sir.” My voice shakes almost as hard as my hands.Why am I shaking like this?“I apologize. How can I help you?”

“There’s this convention in New York I really need you to go to next week.” My blood freezes in my veins, and I swear my heart stops beating. “I—”

“Can you ask someone else?” My voice is small, and it trembles violently. I can barely get the words out. Because I know what this means. I can see the fucking signs. The same dates are looming. The same work trip. The impending crash. The way I die. No, not again. Not this time. “I don’t really think—”

“No, Mr. Moore.” Duncan sighs. “You’re the man for the job. You know the position inside and out, and there’s no one else who does. This will also set you up for that promotion.”

Fuck the promotion!

I just want tolive.

“Uh.” I clear my throat. “I’ll think about it.”

“There’s nothing to think about,” he replies. “You’re going. The hotel has already been booked. You leave on Tuesday.”