Page 107 of Wingmen

“Yeah.” Dustin sighed. “Me neither.”

“But maybe I’m being selfish? Because I’ve been watchingyou my whole life, and if you’re not there, then I don’t know whoIam anymore.”

Dustin scoffed. But Elliot didn’t laugh, and he realized he realized he meant it. He sat up on his elbow. “Roddy…are you serious? What do you mean you don’t know who you are? What happened to being the first Elliot Rodriguez?”

Elliot shrugged, quiet. “I only got here by doing it like you did.”

“Kid, you don’t do itanythinglike I did. I watched you. Yousing.”

He laughed. “Claro. Do you not? It’s fun.”

“Yeah.” Dustin sighed and lay down again. “That was never really what it was about for me.”

“Fun?” Elliot frowned. “Then why do you do it?”

Dustin took a moment to think about the best way to answer this, and realized…he couldn’t.

And it hit him.

Why was he doing it?He truly didn’t know anymore. Because there was nothing else. Because it was all he knew how to do. Because Ol’ Dustin Bennet didn’t have anywhere else to go.

Hewasclinging to this. And he was standing in Elliot’s spotlight.

What happened to his brain when he went back on the roster in January?Realistically. Realistically, would he keep examining it, like his psych said he needed to?

Or would he go right back to where he’d been? Refusing to stop, or slow down, or ask for help. To let anyone see him bleed. Picking himself up off the boards and telling everyone to fuck off even thoughyouknow your nose is broken, Bennet.

And if that’s what he did, how long would it be before he was back in a hotel room in Vancouver? Or somewhere worse.

What would he be teaching the kid by doing that?

Hadn’t he just told Roddy that he shouldn’t stay in a thing ifit wasn’t good for him? Orsafe?Hadn’t he told him that if walking away was better for him, then he should do that? That he didn’t have to prove anything?

He was pointing the finger at Rodriguez again. And three more were pointing right back at him.

For the first time since March, Dustin saw, clearly and painfully, what he had to do. He heard it in his head again, and weirdly, again, it was Tom:

“Stop.”

He turned to Roddy. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to say it out loud without breaking down, but luckily, Roddy wouldn’t care about that. He’d cried in front of Dustin so many times now that watching Dustin do it would only be reinforcing for him that it was perfectly acceptable.

Shit: was hementoring?Was he finally doing it? He was. He finally got it. Jesus fucking Christ, it was so fucking obvious: you didn’t mentor the kid by telling him what to do. You did it by mentoring yourself.

He reached down and took Roddy’s hand.

“I think it’s time you started being the first Elliot Rodriguez,” he said. “And I think it’s time I got the fuck out of the way.”

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

Elliot

Dustin crawled into the Bernie’s parking lot like he was trying to make the car invisible. It was nine PM on a Tuesday, so the bar was dead and the lot was dark, but Bennet was hunched behind the wheel and peering around like he was about to rob a bank.

“This is so sketchy,” he grumbled, “I don’t know how I let you talk me into this.”

Elliot rolled his eyes, grinning. “It’s not sketchy, we already did it once. Oh! Over there!” He tapped Dustin’s arm and pointed to the back corner of the lot. Dustin pulled into the spot and shut off the engine. He looked over his shoulder like he expected someone to be following them and Elliot whacked him and told him to stop acting so suspicious.

They were on their way to the airport for his overnight back to Tampa. It was a week since he’d been fucked by Dustin Bennet without bursting into tears, and he’d triumphantly fucked him every day since. Over dinner tonight, he’d had thebrilliantidea – at least, he thought so at the time – to leave for the airport early and do it in the car.