Page 24 of Freeze Frame

“I do.” Jax leaned back in his chair and he pinned me in place with a serious look. I felt like a butterfly, spread open and stuck in place, unable to move. Jax stared at me until I shifted, clearly uncomfortable.

David, so far, hadn’t said anything. His focus seemed to be on the breakfast he was cooking. But I could tell he was paying attention by the way he’d turn slightly when one of us spoke. The glances we were stealing of each other were two ships passing in the night. I’d look at him and he’d look away, only for that to reverse when he looked back at me and my gaze would automatically avert.

“What do you have to say?” The question had to be forced out of me. I pushed it, kicking and screaming inside the whole time.

Jax took a sip of his coffee, then met my gaze. “My dad has done everything for me. He’s always been my champion. Anything I wanted to do, he’s always supported me. Including my career. While he may not watch my work, for obvious reasons, he’s still my number one fan.” Jax leaned closer, his gaze burrowed into mine. “I’m going to tell you the same thing I told Romeo over there. I don’t care. I don’t care that we’ve had sex. I don’t care what the two of you did last night or whenever else. I don’t care.” Jax leaned back and tipped his coffee cup up, draining it.

Stupefied, I watched as Jax stood and crossed the room. He snatched a piece of bacon off the plate. “Next time, I’ll call first.” He nodded at me, clapped his dad on the shoulder, and made his way toward the front door.

“Hey, kid?” David called out, continuing without waiting for an answer. “We’ll have lunch tomorrow. My treat.”

“Damn right it’s your treat.” Jax laughed and then the door shut, and David and I were alone again.

The intimate bubble we’d created had not only popped, but it had been thoroughly destroyed. Knocked down, burned to a crisp, and the ashes scattered.

“David? Are you okay?”

He turned and presented two plates. I’d been wrapped up in my panic and my conversation with Jax—which had gone oddly well—and hadn’t noticed that David had cooked eggs to go with the bacon. The yolks looked like they’d be delightfully runny.

Unsure if I had an appetite or not, I picked up a slice of bacon anyway. It gave me something to do with my mouth and my hands.

“You make adult films,” David stated, sounding neither angry or disgusted. There was a quiet sort of curiosity there. His statement was gentle, not a judgment. Just a fact he’d learned and probably wanted to know more about.

“I do. I have for a lot of years actually. Even pre-transition. It’s how I paid for a lot of things.”

That wasn’t even why it started, though. Money had been necessary, of course, but it was hard to explain and I wasn’t sure how much David wanted to know.

“And you’ve worked with Jax?” Now David looked nervous. He stabbed a yolk with a piece of bacon, and I watched the yellow substance ooze out.

“Not often and not for a long time. I do edit a lot of his stuff though. I didn’t lie about that. I edit films, and I’ve started totake an interest in directing. Lukas is giving me a little room to play more as time goes on. Sorry.” I stopped abruptly, closing my mouth so hard my teeth clacked together. “You didn’t ask for all that.”

A weird silence stretched between us. It was like we both had so much to say that neither of us knew where to start. All the joy of the morning had been sucked out of the room, and it felt like whatever I had with him was now dead in the water.

I’d fucked his son.

I’d withheld the truth of my career from him.

I’d fucked his son.

I’d had fucking sex with his son, and it was on the internet for anyone to see.

“I should have told you.” The words caught and broke, though I tried my best to keep it together.

David surprised me by looking up at me and offering me a smile. It was weak, tentative, not quite a real smile, but it was something. “I’ve been sitting here trying to think if I ever even used his name. There can’t be too many Jax’s hanging around. He’s given me shit in the past for reducing him to ‘my son’ and not using his name. And I guess now I know why it matters.”

“What a pair we make.” I sighed and cut my eggs into pieces with my fork. I wasn’t hungry, but for the sake of not having to say anything, I popped a bit of egg into my mouth and chewed it slowly.

“Are you mad?” I set my fork down and folded my hands in my lap. Mostly to stop myself from reaching for him. I didn’t feel I had a right to even want that now.

It took a minute for him to respond, but he shook his head. Though I didn’t feel the rush of a weight lifting off my shoulders. My stomach stayed clenched.

“I’m not mad. We barely know each other.”

David trailed off and it took me a minute to understand why.

“Josh. I still like to be called Josh. River is the name I chose to use for creating content before I transitioned.”

David nodded. “River is your stage name.”