Page 190 of First in Line

I let out a small, self-deprecating laugh. “They’re still saying all the same things, though they aren’t as loud. I won’t ever enjoy being photographed by paparazzi. Or having strangers speculateabout my life. I don’t think I’ll ever wake up excited about red carpets or interviews or people following us with cameras.”

His lips twitch slightly. “Yeah, I’m not fond of that either. I just learned to live with it.”

“I’m not sure I ever will. But what truly changed is that I started asking myself a different question. Therightquestion.” I take a slow breath. “Would I rather live through all of that with you, or spend the rest of my life without you?”

A small, familiar smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth.

“And the answer came back so clearly, Jax. I’ve spent seven years trying to build a life without you, but not once have I felt as complete as I have during the moments we spent together this season. You are a part of me, Jax.”

There’s so much love in his expression, it almost hurts. I know what he’ll do before he even moves to kiss me. I easily avoid his lips to say, “This leaves us with just one question left to answer.”

“Which one?”

“Would you rather be with a woman who will never truly fit in your world but will forever love you unconditionally and never leave you again, or would you rather find someone who’ll be the perfect fit and always know what to do or say in all circumstances?”

His smile stretches, his hand on my hip gently squeezing. “This one’s way too easy, princess. I’ll take chaos with you over anything with anyone else. A thousand times over.”

“Even if your life is already so full of chaos?”

He nods with absolute certainty.

From day one, this man has known what he wanted. I’ve always known I wanted him. Even as a naive fifteen-year-old who didn’t really grasp what it meant or the full implications. But now I know I wantto bewith him. No matter the cost. Nomatter how hard it might get. Because at the end of the day, it will forever be worth it. A thousand times over.

Slowly, Jax bends over and lays his lips on mine. This time, I let him. I’ve said everything I had to, needing him to understand I didn’t walk away because I didn’t love him enough. No, it was my demons convincing me we’d be better off without one another. But they’re gone now. I’ve accepted that what’s true for me is true for him, and we’ll never be truly happy without one another.

The kiss is slow at first, like a seal of acceptance. We’ve seen each other at our worst, physically and emotionally, and we’ll never be this intimate with anyone else. Now that I’ve bared my soul to him, there’s officially nothing left unsaid between us.

As if we share the same brain, our lips part at the same time. Then comes the warm and wet graze of his tongue on my upper lip. I answer his greed with my own, slipping mine into his mouth, savoring his familiar taste.

Things slowly heat up, almost sneaking up on us, until we’re clinging to one another, my leg thrown over his hip as we grind into each other, moaning and panting.

“Is this room soundproof?” I breathlessly ask as his hands work on opening my blouse.

“Barely.”

“Should we—should we go to your hotel room, then?”

“After. But don’t worry, princess. I’ll keep you quiet.” He’s freed a nipple, somehow, and he lets go of my lips to suck it into his mouth instead.

“Aah, Jax!” I moan.

I tug at the Altron-branded hoodie he’s wearing, desperate to feel his skin on mine. As he impatiently tries to get it off, though, he gets too close to the edge of the daybed. “Fuck,” he lets out as he falls to the floor.

Holding back a giggle, I ask, “Are you okay?”

He’s back on his feet before he can answer, ripping his hoodie off, then the crewneck underneath. My gaze glides over his muscular torso, the perfectly carved muscles there, the tattoos covering his golden-brown skin, the deep V lines at his hips that disappear behind the waistband of his track pants, the rigid and long shape clearly visible in there…

“Your turn,” he demands, motioning at my blouse with his chin.

I slip it off and then unclasp my bra, releasing my breasts. His eyes darken with want at the sight. They stay locked in as he kicks his shoes off and lowers his pants, along with his underwear. His hard length bobs free, and my mouth waters in earnest. I want to taste him. To suck and lick until clear drops of precum seep out, their taste coating my tongue.

As if he can read my thoughts, he shakes his head and groans, “After.”

He grabs my foot, easily removes the shoe on it, the sock, and moves on to the next one. Then my jeans are opened and tugged down, along with the lacy thong I slipped on earlier today, hoping he’d take me back and get to see it.

“You’re so fucking perfect,” he appreciatively mumbles, eyes raking up and down my naked body.

I want to return the compliment, forever in awe of his physique, but I’m cut short when he effortlessly maneuvers me on the daybed, bringing my behind to the edge of it while I’m leaning against the backrest.