Page 20 of Something like Desire

Maren did say that I could create some kind of drama to break up an Aquarius and a Gemini and this screams dramatic. Worth a try.

We walk along the lantern-lit path, the shots causing us to stumble into each other every few feet. “Hey. Watch where you’re going, buddy,” I say, giving him a light push.

“No,youneed to watch whereyou’regoing,” Zach says with a laugh.

If I were sober, I would probably realize that our entire plan is incredibly juvenile but right now, it feels like it might actually work. Who would be able to sleep peacefully after reading a note—from a mystery writer who followed them to this resort—with a warning about exposing them? Not me.

Zach grabs a rock from around the garden, and places it on top of the note. “So it won’t blow away,” he whispers loudly, his speech coming out slightly slurred. He knocks three times on the door and runs to stand next to me, behind the wall where he and I met earlier.

The villa door swings open. Nicholas’s hair is slick with either water from the shower, or perspiration from extracurricular activities (yuck) and he’s wearing a white robe. It quickly registers that he’s probably wearing nothing underneath, which gives me an unwanted mental image based on Maren’s penis size predictions last week.

“When I get back, we’re going to do the pretzel again, baby,” he calls into the room, and I hear my mom’s high-pitched laughter.

“Is that a promise, big boy?” she calls with a playful chirp.

Zach sucks in a sharp breath and makes a disappointed clicking noise with his tongue.

Bile rises in my throat. What the hell is thepretzel? When did my mom start calling peoplebig boy? I thought Maren made that up when she was supposedly lip-reading. And when did Mom become sosexual? I think the most exciting sexual position thatI’veever tried is doggy style.

The door closes again and I turn around, bumping into Zach’s taut body, not realizing how close he was standing behind me. “Do you know what the pretzel is?” I say into his chest. I take a step back, arch my body to look up at him, and bite my lower lip as I wait for an answer.

Zach takes his phone out of his pocket and types on the screen. He breathes in deeply, glancing at me like he’s bracing for impact, then shows me the screen. I skim over the detailed description, accompanied by two naked cartoon people demonstrating. I feel a blush spread over my face and chest.

We catch eyes for a moment and suddenly, completely unexpectedly, I step into him and our lips brush against each other’s. Zach steps backward until he’s against the wall, pulling me so closely into him that I can feel his desire through his pants, making me want to rip his button-up shirt open to feel the skin of his chest against my bare shoulders and collarbone.Ugh. I don’t know why I did that. I have Jayden. I can’t get this close to someone else. The whole tropical vibe and the drinks—it’s all messing with my head.

There’s a creak that sounds like a door opening and my mom’s voice calls. “Who’s there? Who left us this note? What do you want from us?”

Panting for breath, Zach grabs my hand and leads me behind the villa, where we slide down the wall to a crouched position.

“Holy shit,” I splutter. Zach’s breath is warm against the side of my face, making me want to collapse into him, but I shouldn’t do that. I can’t do that.

Instead, I force myself to pull away from him and stand.

“As much fun as I’ve had tonight, I need to go back to my room now.”

Zach’s eyes scan my face. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

“No worries. You’re fine,” I say and then turn and jog toward the garden villas, hoping that me literally running away will create the distance I need to break away from the charge between us.

I wish that what just happeneddidmake me uncomfortable—but the truth is, it didn’t. It only made me want more.

NINE

It’s Sunday night and instead of our usual comedy movie, I told Jayden that I have something else in store for him. The guilt over the urges I had is weighing on me and I need to remind myself that Jayden and I have a steamy connection and that I’m just going through something. What I’m feeling right now...? It’s just a wave of confusion that will be gone before it even fully sets in.

Jayden and I are on his comfortable corduroy couch, my fingers entwined with his. Hairball meows loudly and jumps onto the dining room table, where the sun filters in from the window. I’m glad he’s occupied with sunbathing because things in this apartment are about to get X-rated. I lean in to nuzzle Jayden’s neck.

“You’re...affectionatetonight,” he says quietly, a smile slipping onto his face.

I gently place my hands on his neck and pull him closer, kissing along his jawline, then his lips. “That’s not going to be a problem, is it?”

Jayden tilts away from my lips to respond before I can continue kissing him. “Absolutely not. The only issue is that we haven’t talked about the weekend. How did things go? Did you make any progress? Is your mom rethinking things?”

“Not yet.” I inch closer to him until my lips and his press lightly together, my words causing a vibrating sensation. “I didn’t get through to her this time. But I’m not going to quit.” I ramp up the intensity, slipping my tongue into his mouth hungrily and grinding my body against his lap.

“Whoa. What’s gotten into you?” Jayden pulls back slightly. “Are you kissing me like this because your mom cheating on your dad makes you realize how valuable our relationship is?”

I separate from him to say, “Something like that,” before going back to kissing him. Whenever he begins to pull away, I up the passion. I don’t feel like chatting right now. That can wait. “Let’s take this to the bedroom.” I stand, pull my dress off, and grab Jayden’s hand, leading him into his bedroom where I dive onto his bed and pat the spot next to me.