Page 23 of Bitterness of Spirit

“Yes, I have heard as much. Everybody who has seen Pemberley praises its beauty,” Elizabeth offered, and Darcy’s face softened. He longed to tell her that she might see it for herself one day. He had no right to make such a statement, nor even invite her as a guest. That would only raise the expectations he had tried to avoid for half a year. Though he chose to move silently to the window, he did not miss Elizabeth’s changed countenance.

Shortly, the gentlemen left with the promise of meeting again soon. During their walk back to Rosings, the colonel’s animation only made Darcy more silent.

His thoughts remained behind—with her. He had so many things to tell her, and yet he stood speechless like a simpleton. Of her feelings for him, he could not be certain. Her behaviour was different—and more enchanting—than any other woman he had met, and his ability to read her mind was quite limited. He had never been interested in understanding a woman until he met Elizabeth. He had been polite with them and exchanged pleasantries but never tried to see beyond a woman’s words. With Elizabeth, everything was different.

“I say, Darcy, I have never been so charmed by a woman in such a short time,” the colonel declared.

“You are charmed by every attractive young woman you meet. Just like Bingley,” Darcy said sharply.

The colonel laughed. “True—but not completely. There is something special about Miss Bennet. She is bright in a profound way. She is witty and wise. I imagine that, having her as a life companion, a man would never get bored.”

“Life companion? For heaven’s sake, Richard. You understood that after only a few minutes acquaintance?”

“Yes. I have met enough women in my life to recognize something special right away. If my situation in life allowed it, I would surely do everything in my power to know her better.”

“Richard, please mind your manners. Miss Bennet is a gentleman’s daughter and Mrs. Collins’s friend. She is not someone with whom you may amuse yourself.”

“I know that very well, Darcy. But she seemed quite partial to me too, did she not? I mean—we progressed quite well for a first visit.”

Fortunately, their arrival at the main gate of Rosings saved Darcy from giving an answer he could barely admit to himself. Yes, she did seem partial to Richard, but perhaps that was simply her way. She always had pleasant, open manners; she seemed always at ease with old acquaintances and friends as well as strangers—except him.

He retired to the library, surrounding himself with papers and books for the rest of the day. None of them allowed him to escape Elizabeth’s image, but at least he had an excuse not to speak with anyone.

Several hours late, Lady Catherine interrupted him, asking about his day.

“I have been looking through these papers, Aunt, and I am afraid that Rosings’ expenses are greater than its income. Your estate needs better management. I shall speak to Mr. Jarvis. From my examination, I fear he is not the best steward.”

“He is competent enough, and I trust him implicitly. He has been in my service for many years. Do not worry about expenses; I made a good investment before Christmas. I expect a good profit from it.”

“Investment? Profit? Aunt, of what are you speaking?” Darcy uttered in astonishment.

“Mr. Barnet suggested it to me. We purchased some expensive merchandise from India. It should arrive soon, and I shall double the sum I put in. A really good bargain, I would say.”

“I beg to differ. Why would you do such a thing without talking to me? Does Uncle Fitzwilliam know?”

“What business does he have with my dealings? And since you are yet only my nephew, I believe I am not obliged to inform you of anything. Mr. Barnet was my husband’s friend and business partner for years.”

“And his partner in games of chance too! You know quite well that both lost an appalling sum of money at cards. And they also engaged in onerous affairs together.”

“Darcy, I shall not hear such comments about Sir Lewis de Bourgh! Our family has never been the subject of gossip!”

“My dear aunt, forgive me for saying so, but you always choose to know and to admit only what favours you! You know that such rumours were abroad in Town in Sir Lewis’s last years. And Mr. Barnet’s lack of business sense is well known and proven.”

“I shall not listen to this! When you finally do your duty and become the master of Rosings, you may challenge my decisions. Until then—”

“Aunt, you asked me to supervise Rosings’ income to be certain Anne’s future is safe and secure. I did not ask to be involved! If you require my opinion, I shall gladly but honestly offer it.”

“It is time to change for dinner,” Lady Catherine concluded, slamming the library door.

Darcy put away the papers and began to pace the room. He was again trapped in a situation he loathed. How had he allowed this to happen?

Distressed and unable to put his thoughts in order, Darcy spent dinner oblivious to almost everything around him. He could not name the food that was served or the taste of it, and he responded to his aunt and cousins’ inquiries with few words and even less interest. At times, he glanced at Anne, who looked like a shadow at her mother’s side, and wondered what was on her mind.

But he did not take the trouble to give it much consideration as he allowed Elizabeth’s image to fill his head and heart—and nothing else mattered. Night came as a relief, and in the solitude of his room, he could peacefully think of her. At least, dreams were his to enjoy without harming anybody—except himself.

***

The colonel’s manners were much admired at the Parsonage, and it was generally agreed that he was a lovely addition to Rosings.