Page 60 of The Starling and the Hatter

“And?” I asked, my voice more brusque than I intended.

“And I wonder if you could travel to Winhaven on your own?”

I put down the mallet I’d been using to pound the beam into place and looked at him. “Go on my own?”

He nodded. “You’re responsible enough, and certainly old enough. I would have sent you on your own before now, but you and Elise traveling on your own together…” He lifted a shoulder. “I didn’t think it was a good idea.”

“So you’ve been traveling with me just to be a chaperone?” I wasn’t sure if I should feel grateful or insulted. Or perhaps I should just feel like a fool for not having realized what he was doing.

He gave an unconcerned shrug. “Not only for that reason, but that’s been part of it.”

I let out an annoyed sigh. “And how long did you intend to do that?”

He studied me for several moments, then admitted. “Honestly, I expected the two of you to be married by now.”

I choked on air.

He smiled, but it was a little sad. “Don’t look so surprised.”

“She’s not—” I tried to deny it, but the lie wouldn’t come.

He shrugged.

“She doesn’t want me,” I said, just in case he had missed that fact.

“Maybe,” he conceded. “Or maybe she just needs to know it’s an option.”

“I tried to tell her,” I admitted, needing to say it out loud to someone. “Before she left, I tried to make her understand.”

“And did she?”

I shook my head.

“Then maybe you didn’t try hard enough,” he suggested gently.

“I know.” I’d been kicking myself for not saying more. “But what can I do? Do you expect me to just walk up to her when she comes back and ask her to marry me?”

“No, but a little more honesty about your feelings would be good.”

“What if she doesn’t—”

“Maddox,” he said, his voice sterner than usual. “Do you really want to watch her find someone else?”

I shook my head violently. “No, of course not.” The idea burned.

“Then what have you got to lose?”

I stared out into the street, then finally confessed my most pressing fear. “What if she never comes back?”

“You’ll just have to have faith that she will. I’ve watched her with that White fellow. I can’t believe that such a man is really what she wants.”

I blew out a breath. “I really hope you’re right, Dad.”

He clapped me on the shoulder and we both got back to work.

By the time the sun was setting and we packed up our tools, I knew that he was right. If I had any chance of having Elise return my feelings, I would have to tell her.

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