Page 44 of Kingdom Of Veil And Vow

Someone in a cell farther down shouts, and the spell I’m under vanishes. I dig my nails into the softened skin of my scar, relishing the pain that flares. Gods above, what am I doing? Daydreaming about a guard? A Trusted? Shaking my head, I instead focus on the ring of keys I know he keeps on his belt. I can’t overpower him, and I doubt I’d be quick enough as a mortal to try and yank them from him, even if he dared to let me get close enough. I could pretend I need to change and ask him to turn around… but even then, the chances I’d be able to reach him while on this side of the bars might as well be zero. Xander may get rattled over a naked female, but he isn’t an idiot—

I jerk my head back, a soft gasp parting my lips. “He’s just a man,” I repeat to myself out loud. And for whatever reason, this man grew flushed at the idea of me naked. What might he do if I were to try and kiss him?

Searching the darkened wall in front of me, a frown tugs on my lips. To use myself in this way, to trick him like that… Am I any better than the males who saw me as nothing more than a body to be conquered? Am I any better than Kenji? Sighing, I tilt my head back and let my eyes fall closed. Maybe it makes me just like them, but what is the weight of more shame and guilt if it means getting Immie and myself out of here?

Chapter Twenty-Eight: Xander

Working my way through the dark tunnels on memory alone, one hand drags along the rough, carved-out stone while the other lays over my chest, the vibration of my heartbeat strong beneath my palm. My interaction with Bella taunts me in a horrifying loop in my mind, stuck replaying the moment the connection between my brain and my tongue became severed and I spoke as if I had never beheld a naked female before. I guess there is some truth to that, but I quickly shove those thoughts aside as I follow a bend in the path, my instincts honing in on the door I know to be just a few yards ahead.

I pause when I finally reach the end, hands feeling for the small handle in the dark as I listen for movement on the other side. Confident the space is empty, I tug the door towards me, moonlight from a nearby window cascading over the opening in a silvery stream. Stepping out, I brush the dirt from my pants and undershirt, shutting the hidden entrance to the tunnels until the wall of the room looks smooth again. Across from me is a large bed set beneath a billowing canopy. Next to it is a tall dresser, the top coated in dust. I hold my breath and count to ten before releasing it slowly, shaking my hands out.

Stuck in a council meeting with the king—the subject of which was the minor unrest of the people of Vitour over the draft—I had intended to visit Bella later this evening, after I got a chance to grab a meal for myself and formulate some kind of new tactic to encourage her to talk more about what she knows. But then Jerrick opened his giant mouth as we accompanied King Dolian to his chambers and asked if I’d seen the shifter naked yet. When I ignored his question, he only laughed, Silas and Von echoing the sentiment from where they walked behind us, as if they were all in on a sick joke. Then he brought up Miles and Simon visiting the dungeon, and I needed to fight back the way my anger flared.

For the king to allow Miles such close access to him and his advisor while my own candidate isn’t even recognized is one thing. If that is the punishment I receive for not torturing information out of Bella, I’ll take it. Besides, it’s not like Alden is one of my favorite people right now anyway. But it’s the fact that he is being brought to the dungeon, that he’s antagonizing her while she is there… It had made my skin itch with the urge to move, to go and check on her and make sure she was alright. The need to do so was confusing, and I’d used the time I was still forced to be with the king to ground myself in my three rules. Do not show weakness. Do not deviate from the plan. Do not let anyone get close. I recited them over and over again, but where comfort should have come from the reminders, there was only frustration. Frustration that I was stuck there, that Simon had once again tortured Immie and Bella had been left so vulnerable.

When I could finally leave, I’d rushed down to the dungeon and found Bella lying on the ground just as she started to wake up. I was so startled to see her naked. To see how that beautiful pale hair dripped over her shoulders. Words felt impossible to speak. Fuck, it had felt impossible to take in a full breath. So I bumbled my way through a conversation and now am left to reminisce about it all until I feel two feet tall.

Walking to the door, I carefully turn the handle, cracking it open just enough to see a little of the hall. When seconds pass without a soul in sight, I step out and shut the door behind me, turning in the direction of the kitchens. Most of the rooms on this floor have been abandoned, spaces that were once used to house foreign guests now sitting empty because of the Spell. Sometimes, the servants will sneak away into them for stolen seconds of privacy, but for the most part, this floor in this wing of the palace is always empty. Which makes it the most ideal spot to enter the fray of the servants’ quarters without having to traverse the main areas of the castle.

I descend the first set of stairs, striding deeper into the castle before finding the second set. Now on the servants’ main floor, the lack of bodies passing reminds me of the late hour. I let loose a low curse. Tienne might not even be in the kitchens. But I continue towards them, dipping my chin in acknowledgement as a woman holding a stack of folded towels passes me. Tugging the kitchen door open, I’m immediately hit with the strong scent of roasted vegetables and cooking herbs, my stomach rumbling on cue.

The door to the wine cellar is open, and I’m already halfway towards it when Tienne walks out, three bottles of wine held within her grasp. “Xander,” she breathes, startled. I hold my hands up in apology, smirking at the way she sets the bottles down on a nearby table and then lifts a hand to her chest. “Gods above, you scared me.”

“My apologies.” Her eyes roam over me, doing a double take at the shirt I’m wearing. Her lips part, the question of why dangling there before I cut her off. “I am in need of your assistance.”

“Of course,” she says, hands planting on the table next to the bottles. “What is it?”

“I need a fresh set of clothing for Bella,” I begin, eyeing the food set out on the tables. Walking over to the squares of parchment paper, I grab one and begin to scoop roasted vegetables and chicken onto it. “And a hand with bringing some water down into the room off of the dungeon.”

There’s a long pause in which Tienne comes up behind me, watching as I grab another parchment paper and pile more food onto it. Enough for two. “Might I ask what you are planning?”

“You can ask anything. Doesn’t mean I’ll answer.” I grab a small linen sack next, carefully placing freshly baked rolls into it. “Mind grabbing a fresh waterskin?”

She moves without answering, filling a waterskin and grabbing a silver tray to set it, and the items I’ve gathered, on. Then she adds a fork, shooing me away when I attempt to carry the tray. “Let me pack this up properly. Grayson was just down here to grab a quick meal for himself. Perhaps you can catch him on his walk back to the barracks.” I hesitate, words of gratitude working their way up my throat before she waves them away with a flick of her hand. “I’m happy to help, especially if it gets you closer to the information you need.” She smiles brightly, despite the exhaustion of a long work day clinging to her and her unusually slow movements.

With a quick nod, I turn to chase after Grayson when the kitchen doors open and a head full of blonde hair enters. It stops me in my tracks, my heart jumping to my throat before I look more thoroughly and realize it’s Eve. Shoulders relaxing, I grin in her direction. “Lady Eve.”

“Xander.” She offers me a tentative smile of her own, though it grows wider when she spots Tienne behind me. “Can I help you?” she asks, making her way to my friend. She doesn’t wear the clothing of a maid, instead draped in a cotton dress of light purple.

“We are going to help Xander deliver this to the dungeon,” Tienne says, her eyes catching mine.

Eve looks between us both, her mouth forming a tight line as she nods. “Of course. Happy to be of service to you in any way I can.”

Tienne must have told her about the resistance. Catching the meaning of her words, I give them both my thanks and rush out in search of Grayson. It, thankfully, doesn’t take me long to find him on his walk across the training grounds. On our way back, he eats his dinner while I give him a rundown of the events that have transpired in the past day and what I hope to accomplish by building trust with Bella.

“Stars above,” he mutters when I’m finished, helping me gather large buckets from the laundry room adjacent to the main kitchen. There, a faucet is stationed, and we begin to partially fill the buckets, letting the water only get high enough that it won’t splash out while we haul them. “All this, and what, you’re hoping a bath might make her talk?”

“No,” I grumble, setting the bucket down and fetching another. “Well, yes, but I imagine that a bath after so much time spent in that cell might mean more to her than to you or me.” I don’t add that I wanted to offer her some privacy where she could wash off more than just the dirt and grime of the cell. That, sometimes, the solace of a hot shower where I could think of nothing but the water raining over my skin was the only reprieve my mind is ever given.

With my second bucket filled and two held in Grayson’s hands, we make our way from the laundry room and back towards the empty bedroom I came from, Grayson’s grumbling following behind me as we hunch over and enter the tunnels. I fish out a small flame gem and hold it between two fingers, angling them just enough that light is cast all around me.

“I’m too old for this,” he says, making me snort even as my own muscles protest the weight of the water. “Are you doing this because you truly believe there is more information to be had? Or because of other reasons?”

“What other reasons would there be?”

His weighted pause makes me grip the handles more tightly. “I’m not one to presume things, Xander. You know this. But I’ve got an imagination all the same. You visit her nearly every day where you’re in close proximity.” My molars grind, and despite being unable to see my face, he laughs. “I’m just saying, far less interesting romances have started with the same premise.”

“Your imagination is more fantastical than you realize,” I say, the sharp cuts of the flame gem digging into my fingertips. I should have asked Grayson to hold it with his mouth. Our boots are the only sound as we cross the final underground stretch before finally making it to the hidden room. Relief fills me as I see the provisions left by Tienne and Eve. “This way.”