Page 42 of The Virgin Playboy

Planning to catch him before his shower was done, I did my best to tie up my hair, but I'm sure some moisture would seep through enough to shrink it a bit. Stripping down to nothing, I climbed in the shower, admiring the suds sliding down his body. But I wasn’t here for that. I was here to plead my case.

He didn’t ignore me, but he certainly wore his stress in his features, as it felt pretty foreign to be face to face, and he didn’t smile. Reaching in to grab his face, I attempted to stretch his lips into a smile, but he didn’t seem amused. “Jaq, stop.”

“Graham, I’m not trying to be misleading. Or confusing. I’m just honest with myself.”

“About what?”

“That I met you at the wrong time?” I half smiled.

“For someone as amazing as you are, you have a habit of self-sabotaging yourself.” He cupped my face in his hands.

“I’ve just…always been the fun girl. The one you don’t take too seriously. Mrs. Right Now. I’ve come to terms with the idea most people like me in the now, but never see a future with me. And it’s my fault. Because I’ve always been afraid to ask for more, in fear it’ll be like college. That time was very dark for me, and I’d rather be the fun girl than the one carrying a dark cloud.”

“Thank you for admitting that to me. I know you’ve dealt with a lot, and using sex as a shield has protected you from some of that. But Jaq, I’m not the other men you’ve dealt with. I’m just one man. And I don’t put people in boxes like that. Being with you is the furthest from wasting my time, Jaq. But sometimes your fear, or not feeling worthy enough exhausts me. Because it feels like I’m not doing enough to not make you feel that way,” as he leaned into kiss me.

“You’re someone I’m willing to experience the best parts of life with. Even the worst. And that isn’t small for me to admit. I’ve moved at your pace this whole time, but it felt incredible to be introduced as your boyfriend, only to have it not be true. I want you. I want this. I want us. But if you don’t want it, don’t give me hope that there’s a chance this will evolve.”

“Before today, I didn’t even think you wanted things to evolve,” I admitted.

“Jaq, I wouldn’t be building something this vulnerable with a person to just be a permanent booty call.”

Wrapping my arms around him, I saw sincerity in his eyes and I wasn’t sure whether I would sink or swim choosing to go this path. “I don’t even know what being in a relationship would look like for me in 2026.”

“For me, it’s look like planning things for once. I love spontaneity, but a girlfriend deserves more effort out of me. And it looks like a lot of things, like making bathroom and dresser space. More sex. Foot rubs and more homemade dinners. Maybe even a key to my place. More sex,” he hummed that last part.

“We’ve kinda played hard and fast with the friends with benefits part.”

“It just means in a relationship, we don’t have to wonder if we’re sexually compatible or not. Jaq, I don’t want to go back to a time where you’re surprised when I surprise you. I want you to know I’ll be there for you. But you would have to trust me, the way I’ve been trusting you.”

After the shower, it became a tender kind of night. One that transitioned from lovemaking to comfort cuddling. He was really good at cuddling. I was grateful to have such a strong, warm cuddle buddy to spend every season with.

“Graham?”

“Mmmhmm?”

“Thank you for being patient with me. I've been patient with your body, but you've been the one patient with my heart. I feel really lucky to have someone so patient with me.”

“Jaq, really. I'm the lucky one.”

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Graham

“I can't believe I'm gonna meet your folks,” I squealed, torn between whether I should go with the brown jumper or the green. Jaq was wearing a dark red, so ended up going with the brown. The last thing I wanted were for her folks to think I was trying to outshine her.

Pursing her lips, she sat up from the bed, confused. “What do you mean? You've already met my folks. Which my mom just texted me to tell you to leave all that sexy at home. I'm texting her back, too late. Ma, he's wearing his glasses this time,” she joked, me dying inside if she were actually texting her mom that.

“Yeah, but that was different. It was at your book launch, and that night was more about you and your achievements. Tonight, I'll be partaking in a holiday we don't celebrate in New Zealand, and I just want to be sensitive to your traditions while also sympathizing with the indigenous people the holiday was built on. I don't want to say the wrong thing, and when I'm nervous, I tend to do that. It really ramps up my anxiety picturing the worst thing that can happen.” Jaq stood, wrapping her arms behind my neck, as my arms relaxed around her waist.

“Graham, take a deep breath. Relax. In all fairness, we don't even celebrate Thanksgiving as is. It's just more like, we celebrate the time we get to spend as a family. If it makes you feel any better, it's not like…my entire family. Just an aunt on my dad's side. Her family, which includes two of my cousins. It'll be my mom's brother. His kids. Their kids…hmm, let's see,” she pondered making the cutest face when she did.

“My dad's sister-in-law. She moved to New York after my uncle died, but you know she's still family. There's nothing crazy, I promise. The stricter rules are more for the people bringing food, and we try to keep things nice and simple. Leave the soul food up to the Black Americans, leave the Caribbean food to the Caribbean folk. My auntie Jill tried to take on the mantle of making mac and cheese one year, and woo, I have never seen so many upside-down plates in my life. Poor thing, ain't volunteer since. Other than that, we keep the diaspora wars out of our family bonding. Any other time, all bets are off,” she joked.

“Now come me on, it's time to get going. The Lyft prices are already higher than normal.”

***

Pulling up to her parents' place was a nice change from the city. It wasn't exactly green pastures and oceans like I was used to, but far from the hustle and bustle of the boroughs. Given how many family members she clocked might be here, I expected anything but quiet, at least for Queens.