Page 78 of Queen of Ruin

“Why can’t I find him anywhere, then?!” I gasp, staring up at him. It’s not struck me until now just how much I rely on seeing him at the end of every hard day, like his presence is the rock I need to remain sane.

“He might just be asleep somewhere, like the library or something,” Bradley assures me. “We’ll scour the CCTV and⁠—”

“Brad.”

Cassian’s tone makes us both turn to him and he faces us with a grim expression. “He left the building.”

“What?!” I screech.

“How is that possible?” Bradley’s grip on me tightens.

“Frank saw him. He said he was feeling claustrophobic and was afraid of heights. Frank sent him to the lobby to be watched by George, but George claims he never saw him. CCTV shows him getting out of the elevator, though.”

“What the… where would he even go?” I spin back to Bradley. “That bounty is still active, right? You said you wouldn’t close it down because it could still lead somewhere, and now he’s out there in the city by himself!”

“We’ll find him,” Bradley says firmly.

“I can’t lose him.”

“You won’t.”

“No, you don’t understand!” I push his hands away, stepping back and gasping as if the air in here just isn’t good enough. “I don’t remember enough. I don’t know who I am. I feel like I’m constantly chasing a dream from three days ago and it’s just not clear enough, and Diego is the only clear thing. He’s the only thing that makes any sense to me!”

Pain flashes across Bradley’s face as he nods. “We’ll find him.”

“You have to,” I gasp. “He’s the only thing I know for sure, okay? I need him. I need him.”

I love him. I can’t bear the thought of losing him.

30

VALENTINA

“This is insane!” I pace back and forth along the hallway between the kitchen and the lounge. “You told me we were safe here, you told me nothing could happen while we stayed here!”

“You’re right,” Bradley replies tightly. “I’m sorry, Valentina.”

“No, I’m sorry.” Frank steps forward, his face grim. “This is all my fault. I’m the one who let him leave and I didn’t check in with George immediately to make sure he was down there. This is my fault.”

I want to yell. I want to scream and lash out and make Frank feel even an ounce of the tight, twisted pain that’s radiating through my chest at Diego’s absence, but I don’t. Deep down, I know it isn’t fair.

“No,” I say with a deep, pained sigh. “This… this isn’t your fault. It isn’t either of your faults. It’s mine.”

“How do you figure that?” Ruslan asks as he walks through from the lounge with his phone in his hand.

“Diego told me he had somewhere he needed to be and he looked… tense. But I brushed him off because I was so excited to have remembered something that I thought he could wait. But he’s been waiting ever since he met me. His entire life has been put on hold and threatened all because of me, and not once have I stopped to ask him what he wanted or what he needed. That’s on me.” Both my hands rest on my hips, and my head falls as a sting of helpless tears creeps up. “This whole thing is on me.”

“Don’t do that,” Bradley says gently. “Don’t put this weight on yourself. There’ll be plenty of time for that after we find him. Right now, we need to track down where he went.”

“Raven’s on it with Cassian,” Ruslan replies. “His phone is off so we can’t track it, but she was able to get his message logs. He was messaging that Mindy person.”

“Mindy?” My head snaps up. “Saying what?”

Ruslan moves next to me and shows me his phone where a duplication of Diego’s messages flash on screen.

“Little alarming that you can even do this,” I murmur. “Holy shit, though.”

“Seems Mindy was spiraling and Diego was trying to calm her. She stopped messaging after this threat, though, and this is around the time he was last seen here. These messages pinged off different cell towers throughout the city, so he was on the move while texting her.”