Page 42 of The Seeker

I felt his gray gaze long before my eyes connected with his where he leaned against a tree on the opposite edge of camp. I wondered where he’d spent the night, if not in the tent I’d commandeered, but I didn’t feel like asking. He no longer wore his uniform, dressed instead in a plain white shirt and breeches.

It was the most informal outfit I’d ever seen him wear.

“You two were on the right track. We will continue the hike north. There’s a small village I hope to reach within a few days.” Otho stepped into the clearing, kneeling to pack up the tent I’d just emerged from.

“Supplies?” I asked. “Ena and I only have a waterskin and the sword.” And the vials of poison between my breasts, but I kept that information to myself.

“We will forage as we go, but we have enough for now,” Otho replied, frowning.

I knew I looked worse for wear, and I didn’t care. As Otho turned back to his task of packing the tent, I slipped behind the nearest tree, downing the last potion before I replaced the empty vial in my brassiere. Though it was uncomfortable, I knew I would need them as soon as I was able to find a poisonous plant I could use.

The group of them worked quickly, and by the time I stepped back into the clearing, the camp was reduced to several large traveling sacks, each of the men reaching for one as they exited the camp.

We climbed the mountain in silence, Otho choosing to walk by my side even though we didn’t speak a word to each other. I knew we would need to talk eventually, but with the climb as steep as it was and my anger still at a boil, now wasn’t the time.

I also needed time to sort my emotions. To decide which ones I would disclose to Otho, and which I would keep for myself. I knew it was likely better to tell him everything, but I couldn’t bring myself to divulge the pain I felt at losing Leif just yet.

He wouldn’t understand.

Askel and Karl climbed on either side of us, with the other three men taking the lead. Ena trailed behind, often stopping to poke in various bushes.

I tried to visually search for my belladonna, but every time I paused or leaned down to look for a certain plant, Otho was right there, his gaze asking questions I couldn’t answer.

Although my body was still comfortable around Otho, noticeably relaxing in his presence, my mind was in stark contrast. I didn’t know what to say to him after so many fortnights of being apart.

A season of living one of my worst nightmares.

Though, if I were honest with myself, the only reason I wasn’t a crumpled mess on the forest floor was because I had adapted to having my freedom and choices taken from me.

Even though I’d sworn, on the day Hansen and Adis died, that they never would be again.

With a gulp, I cumulated my thoughts into one, finally understanding why I was so angry at Otho . . . and at myself.

When we stopped midday for lunch, Otho must’ve realized what I needed, as he excused himself to hunt as we all took a seat and Karl passed out food. We were all tired, sweat dripping down our foreheads, and we’d barely covered any distance.

“Runa, you missed the introductions last night, but this is Nel, Jase, and Ryle.” Karl motioned last to the man who’d handed me the bread that morning, my eyebrows shooting to my hairline. Now that it was light outside, I could finally evaluate him. He was tall, probably the same height as Otho, but not nearly as broad, his frame muscled but thin. He had dark hair, but it was cut much shorter than Otho’s. His pale blue eyes glinted in a way that made me shiver.

My eyes widened as my brain finally processed his name.

He appraised me, probably spotting the questions in my eyes. “I was never on Malheim’s side.”

I dipped my chin, the silence taught between us as I realized the general Leif had relied on had betrayed him in the end.

Though the lie hadn’t affected me, I still didn’t like the way my chest pinched at his admission.

Ena elbowed me, and I returned to the strip of jerky and slice of cheese in my hands, no longer hungry as I pulled the details of the deception together in my head.

We all finished eating, the rations providing a nice change from Ena’s and my poor foraging. Otho still hadn’t returned, so we all remained seated, except Ena, who moved from her place next to me to wander into the trees.

“You should forgive Otho.” Askel sat down next to me in the place vacated by Ena. “He did his best. Every day he didn’t come for you, it broke him. But he knew we needed to wait until the right moment⁠—”

I shook my head. “I was there for eight fortnights, Askel.” My stint with Leif had far exceeded any of my previous imprisonments, and for some reason, it cleaved my soul in a different way. I wasn’t the Runa Otho saved on the fateful night two seasons before.

“Did he⁠—”

I held up my wrist, displaying the mess it’d become with the two brands imposed on top of one another.

He grimaced. “But⁠—”