Page 42 of Holding Onto Love

“No. Of course not.” The man’s face turned crimson.

“It has been years! She was a child. I know she embarrassed you, but—”

“Not embarrassed. It was flattering…in an embarrassing way. She is a force of nature, your sister. And I liked her. Who wouldn’t? I hated to hurt her.”

“Well, that is very noble. But she was a child. You needn’t punish yourself for a hurt she has long forgotten.”

Benjamin nodded. “All right then. Good. I know it’s foolish of me, but I am relieved.”

“Not foolish. Kind-hearted.” Jasper shook his head. Of all the idiotic… “We’ve covered the Taverstons. I want to hear all about your adventures.”

“Except for you,” Benjamin said. “I suppose the fact that your brother married your fiancé explains the lack of a countess?”

“In part.” He saw Benjamin’s curiosity. “That tale would require a full night to recount and a bottle of brandy a piece.”

“Not brandy.” The man snickered. “I smuggled back some whiskey from the American colonies.”

“We may not call them the colonies, I don’t think.” There was a war there too. Colonies they may be again. Though when he’d asked Crispin, he merely shook his head no. “Is it any good?”

“It will burn a hole down through your boots.”

But would it melt stone?

“Another night then. We’ll catch up on each other’s lives. If I had known of such a delightful prospect, I would not have made plans for this evening.” He could not invite Benjamin along to White’s. Unfortunately.

“No, tonight will not do.”

Jasper started to rise but saw something in his old friend’s face. A hesitation. He lowered himself back down. “I am horribly rude. I was taken aback by seeing you. I meant to send for coffee. And sandwiches. I have no idea how long you were waiting but I’m starving. I imagine you—”

“No, I cannot stay.” He cleared his throat rather decisively. “Iversley, I must make a clean breast of this before…well, before.” He looked strangled and pushed out the words. “I became rather embroiled…what I mean to say is there is a child. Not mine!” he added hurriedly, reddening. “But, well, yes mine. Lud. I practiced this, and now I’m muddling it.”

“Take your time.” He knew his tone had become icy, but what the devil was “mine but not mine” supposed to mean?

Benjamin’s voice shook. “I had a business partner. My judgment is usually sounder, but, well, that’s unimportant. We went to the interior. It seemed like an adventure, I suppose. He was accompanied by his wife and daughter. I will summarize: the couple died. It was tragic. For all I wished him to the devil by that point…well.” He drew a breath. “We were in the middle of no place I could pinpoint on a map.”

“We?”

“Myself and the child.” He swallowed hard. Jasper did too. Benjamin raised his eyes. “It was terrifying.”

Jasper nodded, terrified for him.

“The child…she became rather attached to me.”

What did one say to something like this?

“I would think so.”

“I managed to get back to Halifax. Her grandparents were there. I located them.”

He glossed over details in a way that Jasper, who thought he had done a good job glossing, could only marvel at. They would have to break out that whiskey one day soon.

“They wanted nothing to do with her. Their own grandchild. And I would be damned if I would force the girl on them.”

“You did the right thing. Unless, of course, you think they will come to regret—”

“Damn them if they do!” He made a visible effort to control himself. “I think it very unlikely.” He shrugged. “And they will never be able to find her.”

Jasper let out a long breath of his own. “Tell me what you need.”