Page 85 of Give Me Peace

“What happened in Nashville?” I ask, watching as he pulls a fresh towel from the linen closet and starts the shower.

“A mess I wish I’d caught onto sooner,” Lochlan sighs heavily. “The night Jasper went missing, he’d taken laced drugs without realizing. A friend of his—another guy in their group—was the one that provided them. Along with their supplier, two others were aware that something wasn’t right. They caught up with Jasper before he made it too far from the bar, but he started seizing. They panicked, forgoing 911 and basic human decency, and let the kid die. They dropped him in the closest trash can and went back to partying. Later that night, the three of them retrieved his body and dumped it a few hours away, closer to the mountains.”

“Jesus.” I shake my head, disgusted by the cruelness. “How could they do that to someone? Much less a friend?”

“They’re cowards. The moment Jasper stopped breathing they had a choice to make. They chose self-preservation over doing the right thing. You’d be surprised how many people would respond the same way when backed into a corner. Morality goes flying out the window and that ‘every man for himself’ mentality clicks into place. Thankfully, at least one of them felt remorse and caved after being questioned. Jasper’s parents have a modicum of closure for the time being, but they’ll get their day in court.”

“I’m sorry.” I step forward and wrap my arms around him. “I know it’s not the ending any of you hoped for, but I’m sure his family appreciates everything you did to get to the bottom of it.”

“It’s okay, love. Not every case pans out the way we’d like.” Lochlan squeezes me, rocking us from side to side as the room grows muggy. He kisses my forehead, pushing back to slide his sweats off. I blink furiously, shocked he’d strip down so casually and without an ounce of warning. Lochlan smirks, erasing the space between us until our chests are flush.

“For the record, you can stare at me anytime you’d like.” Lochlan traces my mouth with his thumb. “I’m yours, sweetheart. Any time, any place.” He pulls away without another word, closing himself behind the glass door of his shower. I have no idea how much time passes as I fixate at the distorted image of his naked body, but his teasing voice cuts through the spell he put been under.

“Your hour’s almost up, love. If Kade barges in and joins us, we’ll be broaching an entirely different type of sharing." My mind derails at the image of what he’s insinuating. Try as I might, words refuse to form. I turn and bolt from the room, deciding my lack of response is better than anything that could’ve left my mouth. I’m ashamed for even thinking what’d been on the tip of my tongue. I make it to the safety of my own room without interruption, breathing a sigh of relief as I lean against the door.

I’m being ridiculous. Shame and insecurity have no place here if we want this to work. Eventually, we’ll need to sit down and establish boundaries. Determine what we’re comfortable with and what’s a no-go. It makes me anxious just thinking about the conversations we need to have, but it can’t be avoided forever. What I’d really like right now is a hot bath. I peel my pajamas off and turn the water to the highest temperature I can tolerate. After going through the bath bombs Kash bought me, I choose a floral scent and drop it in. My limbs turn to jelly as I sink inside the tub. With my eyes closed, I tilt my head back and hum along to the song playing on my phone.

“Hey, pretty girl.” I startle so badly it’s a wonder I don’t drown. My hand flies out to the grip the side of the tub but lands on a firm chest instead. I cough, attempting to clear my lungs of water. I glare at Havok, but the innocent smile he gives me all but erases my annoyance. “Slide up, baby. I’m comin’ in.” I avert my gaze as he strips off his clothes, edging forward so he’ll have room to slip in behind me. I doubt he cares about privacy but I give it to him anyway. For some reason, my stomach dips with nerves.

“Shit, that’s hot,” Havok hisses, ripping his foot back from the water. “What the hell, Say?”

“Don’t be a baby,” I tease. “It feels nice once you’re in.”

“Yeah, because you’ve burnt your nerve endings to a crisp and can’t feel yourself being boiled alive.” His sarcasm makes me smile. It takes at least five more tries before Havok fully submerges himself. “Oh, fuck. My dick. My dick burns, Say. It’s on fire.” I toss my head back on a laugh.

“Not funny,” Havok growls, wrapping his arm around my waist to jerk me back. Water sloshes over the tub, soaking my bathmat and the floor. I settle against him, letting my head rest on his shoulder. Havok runs his hand up my stomach, between the valley of my breasts, stopping at the base of throat. He cups my neck, applying the slightest bit of pressure. I tilt my face up, our blue gazes clashing with a potent mixture of want and love. “I missed you, baby.”

“I missed you, too.” I exhale, closing my eyes as he trails kisses along my jaw. Havok slides his legs over mine, using their weight to push my thighs my apart. His free hand tweaks my nipple as he grazes my ear with his teeth. I groan, rocking my hips against him. When he slips his fingers inside me, I jolt from the sudden invasion.

“You’re okay,” Havok whispers, licking the pulse point on my neck. “It’s just me.” I relax, sighing at the first stroke of my clit. He takes me right to the edge before ever moving his fingers. He’s being gentle, going nice and slow, but it’s too drawn out.

“More,” I plead.

“How, baby?” Havok groans. “You want it faster?” He speeds up, teasing me with short, quick strokes. “Or maybe harder?” His fingers slam inside me, his palm grinding against me. I shatter, burying my face in his neck as I sob his name. “Jesus.” Havok rips me from the water and spins me around. I straddle his lap, dropping my head back on a moan as he wraps his mouth around my nipple. His fingers grip my ass as I rock forward, sliding myself over the hard length of his cock. Havok clenches his eyes shut, muttering curses as I speed up. But all I can think of is more. I want him. All of him. I tilt up, aligning us just right, then drop back down. I whimper at the sting, but my eyes never stray from Havok.

“Fuck,” he swears, gripping me tightly to keep me from moving. His icy gaze is filled with worry. “You, okay?” He takes a shaky breath, staring at me intently. I nod, biting my lip as I wait for him to realize this isn’t my first time. It doesn’t take long. A million emotions flit across his face.

“Kash?” he questions, giving no clue if he’s pissed or hurt.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, wishing we had this talk beforehand. I should’ve been honest before taking it this far.

“I’m not upset, baby.” Havok kisses me tenderly. “A little envious, but not upset.” He frames my face with his hands and rests our foreheads together. “Right now, I’m trying to keep myself from fucking you on the floor like a savage. Your tight little pussy is choking my cock. Feels so good, Say.” He sounds tortured, but I’m not sure what the problem is.

“Yes.” I nod like a bobblehead. “That. Let’s do that, please.” Havok snaps his head up, his eyes wide and slightly crazed.

“You want me to fuck you, baby?” Another nod from me. “Hold on.” I’ve barely had a chance to tighten my arms and legs around him before he pushes to his feet. Water drips from our bodies as he sets me on the counter, making me gasp from the coolness. Or maybe it’s the way his cock jumps inside me. “If it’s too much, tell me.” I dig my heels in the backs of his thighs. He slides out, leaving just the tip in, then thrust forward. He groans, his gaze transfixed on the way I’m stretched around him.

“Look how pretty, Say.” Havok trails a finger through the wetness on his cock, groaning as he pops it in his mouth. He pulls out and yanks me from the counter, then turns me so I’m facing the mirror and he’s standing behind me. “Put your hands here.” He lays them by the sink. “Now bend over and tilt your ass back. Good. Just like that.” My legs tremble as he lines himself up and eases in. The angle makes it seem like he’ll never fit. Reflexively, I rise to my tiptoes to escape the bite of pain.

“Relax. I’ve got you.” Havok thrust deep, banding his arm across my front to keep me still. It steals the air from my lungs. I swear he’s touching organs he shouldn’t. “Hang on, baby. I promise to make it better.” He pulls out and pushes back in. Over and over. Until the slight discomfort mixes with pleasure and makes me go limp. “That’s it.” He gathers my hair and wraps it around his fist. With a tug, he pulls me till I’m upright. “Watch. I want you to see who’s fucking you.” My eyes meet Havok’s in the mirror. The picture of us, sweaty and lost in one another, will star in every fantasy I have going forward.

“It’s my cock your pussy is clenching.” He slams inside of me. “My finger that’s teasing your clit.” He pinches it, making me whimper. “And it’ll be my name you scream when you come.” I moan, pushing back to meet his thrusts. With one hand between my thighs and the other wrapped around my throat, I cry his name as wave after wave of pleasure rocks through me. My legs give out, but Havok takes my weight, bending me at the waist so he can fuck me in earnest. “God, baby. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” He pulls out and finishes on my back.

Shit.

“We didn’t use a condom,” I blurt, stumbling to the side as I spin to face him. He steadies me, looking just as wrung out as me.

“I know, Say. That’s why I pulled out.” He drops his head back as he works to catch his breath. “I’ve never went without one. I got carried away, but I swear it won’t happen again. I’m sorry, baby.” I’m shaking my head before he’s even finished speaking.