Page 93 of Minha Dona

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After dinner they inevitably went on to a bar with music and dancing. They had some more drinks, they danced, they talked.

At one point, on the dance floor, Juliana passed close to Helena and her hand brushed Helena’s hip… a touch that lasted less than a second, that nobody saw, that sent a jolt through Helena’s body. Juliana didn’t break stride, she didn’t even acknowledge it, she just moved past and back to her conversation.

She’s a conductor, Helena thought, watching Juliana laugh at something across the bar. And I’m the orchestra. She’s been warming me up all day and tonight she’s going to play.

To Helena’s surprise and relief, she realised that that was precisely what she wanted… genuine submission to someone special to her, witnessed by someone even more special. Tonight was exactly what Juliana had called it on the beach at dawn: a parting gift, the last time between them in this stage of their life.

That made it more important, not less.

Around midnight Juliana caught Helena’s eye from where she was standing next to the bar and held up her phone. The message arrived:

Go home, both of you. I’ll be there in thirty minutes. And Leoa? You’ve been very good today. I’m going to reward you for that.

Helena showed the message to Caitlin. Caitlin read it and Helena watched the flush travel up her neck and reach her cheeks. When she looked back at Helena her excitement was palpable.

“Thirty minutes,” Caitlin said.

“Thirty minutes.”

They walked home along the beach in the dark, hand in hand, the moon on the water, neither of them speaking. The anticipation had solidified into something almost unbearable with the exquisite awareness that in half an hour she would become the lioness who chose to kneel, and that Caitlin would watch her get taken apart in every way imaginable.

At the pool house they showered quickly, separately. Helena pulled her dress back on and, for want of anything else to do, paced slowly next to the kitchen, while Caitlin slipped on a t-shirt and sat in an armchair.

They looked at each other across the room.

“You’re shaking,” Caitlin said.

Helena looked at her hands. She was. Just a little, not much, but everything was coming to a head and she could feel it everywhere all at once.

“I’m scared,” Helena admitted. “Not of Juliana. Not of what she’ll do. I’m scared of you seeing me like this.”

“I know.” Caitlin’s voice was comforting. “You’re magnificent. Remember that. Nobody has the strength that you do.”

There was a knock at the pool house door.

Helena’s heart seemed to stop, then restarted.

Caitlin’s eyes went to the door, then back to Helena.

“Ready?” Caitlin asked.

Helena took a deep breath. “Ready.”

She walked to the door and opened it.

Juliana stood in the warm night, her curls loose, wearing her dress from earlier. Her expression was composed, calm, the playfulness from the day gone entirely. This was the other Juliana, the one that Helena had trained, the one who knew everything there was to know about Helena’s thoughts on dominance and submission and who had, through her own natural ability, taken it and made it something bigger.

“Good evening, Leoa,” Juliana said. “May I come in?”

Chapter 35

Juliana walked into the pool house past Helena without touching her, her eyes moving around the space… the open door through to the bedroom, the low light cast by the lamps in the sitting area, Caitlin sat in her armchair. She looked up at the cross beam that ran the length of the pool house, from the living area through to the bedroom under the vaulted ceiling, and Helena understood immediately: she’s going to use the beam, she’s going to make me stand. She took her time, and the anticipation was unbearable. Helena stood back, arms folded, trying to show that she was much calmer than she felt, while Caitlin sat, her legs crossed, watching Juliana with flushed cheeks.

Then Juliana turned to face both of them.

“Rules,” Juliana said. Her tone was the one that Helena had worked on with her, more measured than her usual delivery, carrying weight. “Helena submits completely. No teaching, no correcting, no trying to manage me from beneath. You’re mine tonight, Leoa, and I need you to actually let go, not pretend to.”