Page 114 of River & Rue

“Hi. Brought you food.”

Her smile twitches higher. “How’d you know I was hungry?”

“Have you met yourself?”

She gasps in false affront, then snatches the bar and pats the boulder beside her. As I sit, our shoulders brush. She doesn’t lean into me, but at least she doesn’t jerk away like I feared she would.

From the corner of my eye, I watch her inhale her breakfast. On her last bite, I hand her the second bar. She eats it more slowly, then tucks the wrappers into the pocket of her flannel.

Her eyes flicker toward me before settling on the water. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” I pause to swallow a surge of nervousness. “About last⁠—”

“I don’t have any STIs.”

I swallow the rest of my sentence and switch tracks. “Okay. Neither do I.”

“And I’m on birth control, so there’s nothing to worry about on that front.”

My chest compresses with what could be disappointment, but since that’s fucking absurd, I dismiss it as soreness from the hike yesterday.

“Good. That’s good. I’m really s⁠—”

“Don’t. Please don’t say you’re sorry.”

I inhale sharply. “Rue, look at me.”

She shakes her head, her gaze falling to her lap. My stomach drops like the boulder has disappeared from under me. Tension tightens my throat and shadows my voice.

“I’m not sorry we had sex. I’m sorry I didn’t take care of you afterward. I also recognize it was irresponsible of me not to discuss birth control or even tell you I have a clean bill of health. But I’d do it again in a heartbeat, even if it meant facing down another bear.”

Her breath quickens, the cheek facing me turning pink.

“You know what else? I fucking love that you’re leaking my cum right now. I love that you’re wincing every time you move and will feel me every step of the walk home. I loved every second I spent inside you, and I want more. I will always want more of you.”

Her eyes snap to me, blue ice thawing as she dissects my expression.

“Want me to prove it? Give me the okay, and I’ll bend you over this boulder right now. I’ll be gentle this time. Maybe.”

Her gaze darts to my lap, her blush deepening. When she licks her lips, I almost groan.

“I… I need to talk to Ivy.”

My dick has never shriveled so fast. Rue’s lips twitch at the disgust on my face, but her amusement is fleeting. She sighs, her eyes returning to the creek.

“I’m glad you don’t regret it. I don’t either. But I did wake up with a lot of guilt. Like a crippling amount of it. I can’t keep this from her anymore.”

“And if she freaks out? Will you choose her over me?”

My heart throws the questions from my mouth, bypassing a hundred mental stop signs. Rue’s expression of shock only compounds my remorse. Recoiling off the rock, I take a step backward and lift my hands.

“Forget I said that. Do what you need to do.” I turn away. “I’m going to take the tent down.”

“Have you told her?”

I stop but can’t bring myself to turn around, not even to see if the tremble in her voice is from hope or fear. I don’t want her to see the answer on my face, or worse, evidence of the war raging inside me.

My head wants me to tell her what Ivy said, convinced that if she knows my sister supports this, she’ll give in. It screams at me to confess my feelings and beg her to give me the chance to make her happy.