Page 49 of To Break the Rules

“I’m so sorry, my lord,” she said, unable to keep the depth of her emotion from her voice.

He paused, looking a little taken aback, a touch of colour at his cheeks that made her smile, pleased to know she could affect him as he did her. “Do you think you might call me Silas?” he asked, staring down at her.

“Silas,” she repeated, liking the sound of it—and the intimacy of the moment—far more than was good for her.

“Anyway, one night I… I couldn’t stand it a moment longer. I went to a house I had visited often in the past. One that belonged to the family of a boy I’d been friends with.”

He broke off and Lucia looked up at him. She watched as he gathered himself and took a deep breath.

“I broke in,” he admitted. “And I stole from them.” Her heart squeezed in her chest as his glanced at her in trepidation. “It wasn’t much,” he added in a rush. “Just food mostly, though… I took some silver. Just a few small items, things I could carry easily and sell with no trouble.”

He ran a hand through his hair and cleared his throat nervously.

“I’m not proud of it, and… and if that story got about….”

“No one shall hear it from me, Silas,” she said, her voice hardened by the truth of her feelings. “I would never betray you, and anyone who could hear that story and not feel compassion… well, you do not need their good opinion.”

The look in his eyes stole her breath, and she knew that if they were not in a public place, he would have taken her in his arms and kissed her. The idea made her weak with longing.

“Well, then,” he said, as she fought with the desire to throw her arms about his neck and beg him to never let her go. “You are guardian of one of my darkest secrets, love. Won’t you trust me with one of yours?”

Lucia bit her lip and then gave a sharp nod before she could change her mind.

“Yes,” she said. “I will, only… not here. Come to the house tomorrow, where we can be private, and… and we’ll talk.”

She watched as he exhaled, such relief in his expression she couldn’t help but smile.

“I’ve been a terrible trial to you, I think,” she said, feeling sad to have caused him such concern, but he only shook his head.

“My fears and concerns are all for you, love,” he said, keeping his voice low as the street around Gunter’s was more crowded than the park had been. “And I regret nothing.”

Chapter 14

Kitty, wherever did you get to last night? Why do you disappear like that? One moment you’re there and the next you’re gone!

―Excerpt of a letter from Miss Harriet Stanhope to Miss Kitty Connolly.

20th July 1814. Gunter’s, Berkeley Square, London.

“What do you suppose they are talking about?” Kitty asked, as they walked a discreet distance behind Lucia and Lord Cavendish, who appeared deep in conversation.

“He’s trying his best to win her heart,” Matilda said with a dreamy sigh. “And she’s a fool if she doesn’t let him.”

“You like him?” Kitty said, giving Matilda an enquiring glance.

“I do,” Matilda replied, nodding. “The good men, the truly honourable ones, don’t come along often, but he’s one.”

“You’re right,” Kitty said, a despondent note to her voice that made Matilda look back at her. “Those are the ones you hold on to with all your might, come what may.”

“You speak from experience?” she asked, a little surprised. Kitty was one of the youngest women in their group, only twenty-one if Matilda had to guess.

She flushed a little and nodded. “Yes, though no doubt you’ll think it foolish.”

Matilda frowned in consternation. “Why on earth would you say so?”

“He was my childhood sweetheart,” she said. “We grew up together. His house was near to mine and we saw each other nearly every day. We always knew we would marry when we grew up, but….”

“But?” Matilda demanded, wondering what fate had befallen them.