Page 54 of He Hate Me

“I could never regret last night. I’ve been imagining being with you since the minute you walked past my room in those little cheerleading shorts while I was unpacking my stuff. I could not believe the scrawny little kid from grade school had turned into such a goddess. I tried to resist my feelings, but…I couldn’t. I can’t. ”

“I wasn’t scrawny.”

“We were both scrawny,” he insists. “Do you remember hitting me with a softball in third grade?”

“What? No.”

“Oh, yeah. I made a rude comment about Shelby while I was walking past you guys at PE, and you ‘accidentally’ drilled me in the ass. I thought my butt was broken and when I told my mom she laughed at me so hard. Women are cruel.”

“This from the guy who spanks us.”

“It’s been a while,” he says, raising an eyebrow. He’s subtly asking, and I wiggle in my seat, imaging how good it would feel to have him spank then fuck me. Less than six hours since losing my virginity and I’m already lusting for more. I’m turning into a regular old sex fiend.

“But still…breakfast?”

“Oh, yeah. I didn’t think I could hide the way I was feeling from your mom. When I saw you walking into the room I wanted to grin like the Joker.”

“I know,” I say. “I probably would have been cheesing just as hard. We took a big risk last night doing it in your room. I don’t know what I was thinking. Where are we going to do it next time?”

“I have an idea where we can go.”

“Where?”

“I need to check with someone first, then let you know.”

“Why do you always have to be so mysterious? And speaking of mysteries, Mom told me this morning that my dad went to St. Joseph’s College.”

“Where is that?”

“I don’t know.”

“Why don’t we meet in the study room. I’ll bring my laptop and we can look it up.”

“That’s a good plan.” I pull into my parking space and turn off the car. I want to lean over and kiss him, and I see him start to move, then pull himself back. It sucks that we have to hide how we feel about each other. I want to run to my friends and tell them all about my first time, but I can’t say peep because of the drama with Mackenzie. We also have to think about my parents finding out, since information always seems to make its way to the last person you want to know.

“See you at lunch,” he says, getting out of the car.

“See you,” I wave goodbye, then grab my stuff and follow him inside.

Twenty

Deja

When I get to my locker, Shelby is waiting for me, looking really nervous.

“Hey,” I say, cheerily, not exactly oblivious to her mood, but too hyped to mirror it. Usually, Shelby’s the kind of person who would put aside her concerns to ask me what’s making me happy, but this morning she’s too preoccupied. She tugs at my sleeve and asks in a low voice, “Did you get my text?”

I shake my head. Based on her tortured facial expression, I surmise that she wants me to look at it now. I didn’t even think to check my messages this morning like I usually do. I honestly didn’t care what was going on with other people.

I see it:

SHELBY: Can you go to PP with me after school?

“What happened?” I ask her, growing concerned.

“I have an appointment,” she whispers, “but I got scared to go by myself. Can you please?”

“What’s the appointment for? Did something bad happen?”