Page 47 of Shattered Hearts

I was energised this morning, which felt amazing compared to the past few weeks. Either I was rushing to the toilet to empty my stomach, or I was dragging myself out of bed to get here at a reasonable hour. Macie has been opening the cafe, which she offered to do as soon as I told her about my pregnancy. She didn’t give me time to argue. Just took the spare keys from the top of the light fixture out the back in the alley where I park Betsie and told me to sleep in an extra thirty minutes.

It might not seem like much, but that extra half hour was so worth it.

But today, I feel like I have energy again. My knee won’t stop jiggling, and my pulse has been steadily racing since I left the ranch. Today’s the day of my first ultrasound to check on the baby. I’m beyond excited, nervous, and intrigued. It’s hard to control all these conflicting emotions, which is why I think I’m buzzing so much.

I’ve had the last few days to wrap my head around that phone call with Scott. Yes, it hurt me, but after crying for what felt like days, I realised that this is probably for the better. I won’t have to force him into being there for his child, because that’s the last thing I would want. I’d rather struggle on my own and love my baby than bring it up in a home where its parents are just co-existing and not in love.

I think that would be worse.

We’d probably just get divorced anyway and be right back where we started. So, really, I see this as a sort of blessing now.

Plus, I have Mum back with me, as much as guilt still riddles me for ruining their holiday plans. But now that they have a caravan, they’re already talking about going on another trip once my baby is born and settled.

Taking everything out the back into the kitchen area to get them out of sight, I help serve customers as Macie focuses on coffee orders. It’s busy enough that I have things to keep me busy and occupy my mind, but I’m not running around like a headless chicken or needing to catch my breath.

Placing some croissants and bagels into a cardboard box, I hand them over to Mrs Spencer. The door-bell chimes, and in walks Hazel with Aspen on her hip. Macie rushes over, snatching Aspen up, who immediately dives into a story about one of the chickens.

Hazel approaches me at the bench.

“How are you feeling this morning, dear?” she asks, not bothering with small talk, which I appreciate. I hate small talk as well.

“I’m feeling much better, actually.” I give her a small smile. “Thank you for letting me sleep over last night. I really needed some time in my own room.”

She frowns. “Your own room?”

I nod. “Yeah, my cousin is staying with us right now, and our house is tiny, so she’s sleeping on the spare mattress on the floor of my bedroom.”

“Oh dear. Well, you are welcome to stay over any time you need. With Reid now living in his own place, the room is available.”

A giggle escapes me. “I think you just like having your house full.”

“Well, when you have five boys, you notice when it’s quieter, and it’s not always enjoyable.”

Macie makes some takeaway coffees for Hazel to take as Aspen sits on the edge of the bench. I grab her a small shortbread jam biscuit, and she munches it down. Hazel tells us more about the farmer’s market she’s attending most weekends in Hollow Grove.

“Laynie, maybe you should have a stall there to sell some more desserts? I bet they’ll love them, and it might bring more customers.”

Macie and I exchange a look, and the corner of my mouth curls. “That’s not a bad idea.”

“You can use Grayson as well. I’m sure he’d help you with setting up and driving.”

“Betsie might not make it that far with her boot full,” Macie adds.

I snort, “She barely makes it with just me in the car, but I’m riding her out until her death, which hopefully isn’t for a while still.”

Hazel smiles, but I can see some hesitation in her eyes. I wonder what that’s all about?

Macie hands over the tray of coffees.

“Well, if you do decide to come along, I can have our spots next to each other. I know Garrett who runs the market, and he’s a good man. He’d do anything to help,” Hazel says.

“I’ll look into it and let you know,” I say.

Nodding, Hazel helps Aspen onto the ground and takes her hand, leading her out of Golden Hour as Macie and I watch.

“She’s so adorable.”

I nod, feeling my cheeks pinch. “She is,” I admit before looking away. “I might contact Garrett later and ask him more about the market. It might be something we could do once a month.”