Page 98 of This is Me

“And fireworks,” I added, and I kind of wished I was joking. “Have you asked anyone out yet?” I asked, shifting my position on the chair to get a better look at Cooper, who was still swinging his legs.

“I mean, there’s no one I really like, I guess.” Cooper sighed, scratching his head in a frustrated way. “It’s kind of hard when you’re trans.”

“You know… you could always ask Blaire,” I suggested, speaking slowly and looking away from Cooper.

“Oh, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. Can’t do that,” Cooper said quickly, running his words together and I looked back at him to see him shaking his head.

“What? Why not?”

“She’s your best friend, and I don’t know. It’d be weird!”

“You seem to like each other, though. I wouldn’t think it’s weird.”

“I guess. Maybe I could ask her. Maybe.”

“Does… she know?” I asked stupidly, unable to stop myself.

Yes, it was a concern of mine that Blaire would think of Cooper differently if she knew he was transgender, and I also knew that it wasn’t my place. So, why did I ask? Because I’m a fucking idiot.

“Look, Pete, thanks for the suggestion and, uh, blessing, but you don’t need to worry about that. I can take care of myself,” Cooper stated bluntly, looking away from me, and I felt my face drop.

“I’m sorry. I know it-it isn’t my place,” I muttered, staring at the table where my books used to be and fiddling with my hands in my lap.

“It isn’t. And I’m capable of handling it.”

Silence fell between the two of us as the sounds of other students filled out ears, all enjoying their lunchtime. After a few more moments of us sitting quietly, I looked back at Cooper, watching him swing his legs as he looked out onto the field.

“Well, uh,” I started, clearing my throat, and Cooper turned to me. “I’m not a hot girl or anything, but, uh, I could go with you?”

“Isn’t there a boy you wanna take?” Cooper asked, smiling at me, and I was glad it was back.

“Oh, yeah. The options are limitless.”

“You could ask Trent?” Cooper suggested, and I knotted my eyebrows.

“I don’t think it’s wise for me, an eighteen-year-old, to ask Trent, a fifteen-year-old, to be my date.”

“I mean, you have a point. Though, I’m not eighteen either.”

“You turn eighteen early next year,” I said with a shrug. “Besides, if you don’t say yes, I won’t be going. Because I wasn’t going to go. But, if you’re my date…”

“You are so awkward and cute,” Cooper cooed, and I felt my face begin to heat up.

“Is that a yes?” I asked, trying to hide my blushing face.

Why the hell did compliments make me so uncomfortable?

“Yes. We will go together,” Cooper agreed, still smirking. “But only if you promise to help me get ready.”

“Deal!” I smiled at Cooper as he held out his hand for me to shake it, and I did. “I will help you choose an outfit.”

“Thank God. I have zero fashion sense.” Cooper laughed, dropping my hand and jumping off the table.

“I have none either, but Andy does, so I should invite him if that’s okay?”

“Yeah, of course! Does that mean…”

“Yes, Blaire will probably be there to help, too.”