Page 59 of For I Have Sinned

Part of me doesn’t want to go to the library again for nightly prayer. I know it’s wrong of me not to follow through on my word and meet her every night, but being alone with her has become too risky. When I see her in the corridors or the dining hall, there are people around, and although I still get that urge to touch her, it’s easier to fight when there are witnesses.

I’m sitting in the dining hall now for lunch, Father Keaton on my right as he always is. I try my best to be normal and carry on a conversation with him so that he doesn’t suspect I know his secret.

He talks to me about the things we always talk about during our meals. This conversation is about Prayer on Sunday. I’m not speaking this time; just listening to him and then sitting in the confessional after he is done.

Celine catches my attention when she sits down next to Joanna. She doesn’t bother to look at me, and I don’t expect her to. After how I left her in the library the other night, I’m sure she is pissed at me.

I watch her talk with Joanna. From the snippets I can hear, she is talking about the movie we are showing. Celine doesn’t seem to care too much about the topic. Usually, when she stops paying attention to the conversation, it’s when she sneaks glances at me.

Not today, though. Her eyes remain on her plate as she eats.

Under the table, I squeeze my hand into a fist. Why am I so frustrated that she isn’t looking at me? My eyes slide from her to Joanna, who is stealing a glance at Father Keaton. It’s only a split second, but I don’t miss it. I move my head to look at the man beside me, attempting not to make it obvious, and when my eyes land on him, I see him briefly look at Joanna.

“Will you see if Celine will be joining us for our movie night?” Father Keaton asks.

Judging by the expression on her face when Joanna was talking about it, I’m gonna say that she won’t be there. But I can’t tell him that, or he’d know I was watching her.

“I can ask her.”

“Good. I think she’d benefit from the film.”

“I agree.” Do I really?

“There are some other things that I wish to discuss with you.”

My heart stops. “About Celine?”

“No.” He shakes his head, causing my shoulders to relax. “About things I have planned for the end of October. I want you to be part of the event.”

“Event?” I question.

“We can discuss the details later.” He gestures around to the women in the dining hall. “When there aren’t so many ears.”

“You don’t want them to overhear?”

He bobs his head side to side like he is choosing his words carefully. “I want it to be a surprise.”

“Okay. I can meet whenever you need to.”

“Let’s set up a meeting for next week. How does Wednesday morning sound?”

I nod. “That’s good with me.”

He smiles and continues eating.

When I finally pull my attention away from him and let it land on the other table, I notice Celine is no longer sitting there eating lunch.

Sliding my gaze to the door, I don’t see her there either. Shit. Did she take the moment of me being distracted to sneak out of here? She wouldn’t try to escape again, would she?

Panic begins to set in.

I grab my plate and excuse myself from the table. After setting my plate in the bin, I begin to seek her out. Down the corridor, I quicken my steps to reach the hall that leads to the exit of the building, but stop in my tracks when I hear her voice.

It isn’t coming from the direction of the lobby, but from the courtyard. A light laugh echoes out in the open, and as I approach the entry to the space, I almost don’t see her. She is hidden behind one of the trees, back turned toward me.

Who the hell is she talking to? If I remember correctly, Esther was still sitting at the table when I left.

I keep my footsteps light as I draw close so she doesn’t hear me. Once I’m behind her, I see a black device in her hand. A phone? Where in the world did she manage to find that?