Page 11 of Crusher

“It means she’s seeing someone, so maybe you need to as well,” she husks, trying to be sexy as she looks me up and down, and I growl before storming out of the shithole, trying to control my urge to burn the place down.

Five times I’ve come here and five times she’s said shit I don’t like.

“Son?” I hear my dad call in between my jabs and I tense even further as Knuckles sighs. The only brother who can see my disconnect with my father while everyone else is focusing on Blaze’s disconnect. Of course, Linc still prospected in and took over his role, something he says he’s done for me, to have a relationship with me but I haven’t spoken to the fucker since he punched me in the face for kissing Roxy. He blamed me for her leaving town, only just noticing that I’d shut down after he hit me then regretted hitting me instantly.

Trick, our VP, mentioned he patched him in, after I refused to sponsor him, to keep an eye on me, but as far as I’m concerned, he can fuck off, and so can the man trying to get my attention.

“I don’t think now is the right time, Killer,” Knuckles grunts as I kick the bag again.

I can feel the sweat dripping from me, I can feel tiredness taking over, but I need that, I need something to help me pass out.

Unless I’m working, I’m here, trying to tire myself out.

“He’s my son, I just need one fucking minute!” Killer snaps, and Knuckles reminds him, “You tried stopping him from becoming Sergeant!” and I grind my back teeth and boot the bag.

“He can’t take over from you because my eldest will become the road captain, meaning he can only be a normal brother!” my dad snaps as I walk away from Shooter after refusing to take over from him. He hadn’t caught the whole conversation, and the club stays silent, tension radiating from the room.

His eldest, who wants fuck all to do with him, right…

“And you spent years forcing him to learn a fucking role you’ve just torn from him after you cheated on your fucking wife!” Shooter shouts, “Stop punishing your son for your fucking actions like you have done since you got half of us arrested!”

I don’t stop walking. I’ve done my job, went on the club run, while ignoring that fucker who is supposed to be my biggest supporter, so I don’t need to be here anymore.

I don’t want to be a patched brother, so why in the fuck would I want to be an officer for a role I was never trained for?

“I hereby put in a club vote for Crusher to get sworn in once Cage is released from prison!” Shooter declares, and the whole room shouts, “Aye!” but I don’t stop, instead, I slam out of the fucking clubhouse, wishing Cage wasn’t locked up.

Cage got locked up after Toya killed his sister, and he hasn’t been the same, continuously rebelling, hating life, refusing to take his rightful place, and I don’t fucking blame him because, fuck, I don’t even want to be here.

“Son!” my dad snaps, and I kick the bag even harder with a grunt before I spin and walk to the end of the ring, adamant to leave. “Look, I just want a minute, I miss my son,” he says as I grab my shirt, putting it on, then I grab my cut, reluctantly putting it on, before grabbing my keys.

“Get lost, Killer,” I snap as I storm past my father, who opens his mouth.

I want fuck all to do with him, especially after he announced to everyone a month after Alexiana left that I couldn't have loved her that much because I fucked Roxy in the strip club. Blaze lost it, all because I refused to speak to him about it, and Dad declared Alexiana’s cut had to be dismissed, which no one agreed with.

Yes, I fucked her once because, of course, I was again drunk, but I haven’t touched her since, as everyone believes. I wanted to hurt my girl for hurting me by not fighting for us. She knew I regretted what I did, she knew I was fucked up in the head and made a stupid decision. She knows it will forever haunt me, but then she ran and after graduation when I realized she wasn’t even coming back for that, I got drunk, I made the biggest mistake of my life, especially when Roxy claimed to be pregnant even though I fucked her in the ass.

The bitch still works at the strip club and is still singing about how we’re together. I just can’t be fucked to entertain her, and I certainly cannot be fucked to entertain him.

Just like Blaze, I haven’t spoken much to my father, and I prefer it that way.

“Son, please,” Dad pleads as he follows me out, and I climb on my bike.

Mom agreed to give him another chance, despite him fathering another child, despite him pushing me out like I meant fuck all to him. He begged and she agreed to counseling, and if I’m being honest, I haven’t spoken to her much either because I can’t understand how she can forgive him fathering someone, about knowing about it and keeping quiet about the possibility of the child being his. Fuck, she even wants Blaze to call her ‘Mom’.

He’s a selfish motherfucker, while she’s an idiot.

“I’m sorry, son, please,” he says, and I mutter, “Tough shit,” as I start my bike and rev it.

I don’t know what he expects.

For the first two years after everything came out, he spent all his time with Blaze, teaching him the ropes, and I get it, he had a shitty upbringing. Dad is to blame for that, but my own father dismissed me, after spending half my life putting me down if I didn’t do as he said. If I didn’t read the map right, if I tried to go to a club party or even have a fucking laugh at a club family day and I get it, Blaze is only in the club because of me. I understand he wants to be close again, but honestly, our relationship was fractured after he punched me, not seeing the turmoil I was in finding Alexiana gone.

“I miss my fucking son!” he shouts, and I salute him and remind him, “Your son is currently at work, in the office at the strip club,” and he growls with frustration, and he snaps, “You’re being immature!”

“Then maybe you shouldn’t have forced me to learn a role, taking away all my free time. Hours upon hours of learning, only to shove me aside when I did nothing but try to make you proud,” I reply and I rev my bike before I say loudly, “Go back to your prodigal who you wanted aborted, yeah?” before I roar off down the road without looking back.

***