Page 25 of No Darker Temptation

No amount of pleading or begging is going to uproot me from my corner of the bar. My feet are killing me, I’m sleep deprived, and this Colombian faja Mimi got me is a little too good because I haven’t felt my diaphragm expand or blood circulate to my upper thighs in at least three hours. My face is heavy with layers of makeup and there’s enough hairspray clinging to my deep red waves to put another hole in the ozone layer.

No one has any idea what it took to plan a wedding of this caliber. Our entire immediate family has been here since late Wednesday evening preparing for the ceremony. Brent’s father plays golf with the director of the venue and so we’ve been going back and forth from the hotel, which is on the premises, the last few days to make sure everything was running smoothly. In the last seventy-two hours we’ve seen at least twelve inches’ worth of snowfall which put a delay on everything. It was like a domino effect—once one fell over the rest followed.

First, I had to coordinate the arrival of the entire wedding party on Thursday and get them set-up in the hotel. For final fittings, half the bridesmaids’ dresses and three groomsmen suits were delayed. Most importantly, the hemming on Karina’s gown wasn’t yet complete because two weeks ago, she had to go back a fourth time to get it taken in. The stress has induced weight loss at such an alarming rate that at this point, my aunt and I have had to set alarms on our phone to force Karina to eat.

Let’s not even get started on the rehearsal dinner on Friday. Brent’s parents insisted the dinner silver be imported from Italy because they thought it’d be tacky to use the ones provided by the caterer. Which, by the way, was a beast onto itself. Michelin star and always booked out a full year in advance. No one has any idea how many strings I had to pull to get that done. The near-psychotic internet deep dive I did in order to find out that the restaurant owner’s wife’s best friend’s son went to college with me. And then the two dates I had to suffer through before manipulating my way into a favor of this magnitude.

Forgive me if I’m not feeling celebratory. I did my part—I was the maid of honor from heaven and now I just want to enjoy the open bar in peace.

“Do we know when they’re cutting the cake?” Stacy asks.

“Not soon enough,” Mimi replies. “It looks so good I just want to take a bite out of it.”

“Scram, all of you!” Karina joins us and hugs me from behind, squeezing tight. “She’s exhausted from being the best maid of honor of all time!”

I turn my head and take a glance at the dance floor. Shea and Taylor, Karina’s other two bridesmaids, are shaking their hips and letting loose. A few of Brent’s grimy groomsmen are looking them up and down as if they’re the only two people at this wedding who don’t know Shea and Taylor are married to each other. Stacy and I exchange looks of mutual distaste before eventually rolling our eyes.

“When’s the officiant coming out?” Stacy asks.

“Another fifteen minutes?” Karina guesses. “It’ll be quick. We did the ceremony earlier. Now we just have to say I Do and sign the papers.”

That’s another thing. Not only did Brent talk her out of having our childhood priest marry them but he convinced her it’d be a good idea to split the ceremony in half. It would’ve made more sense to have the party first and end with the official ceremony but no. We’re going to gather by the stage at a quarter to twelve and do the vows all over again just so they can say “I do” as the clock strikes midnight. They’ll be New Jersey’s first newlywed couple.

How wonderful.

Karina pushes her dress aside and hops onto a stool. “Can you guys give us a minute?”

I feel like shit that she’s worrying about me on her big day but I can’t help myself. I’m so tired I can’t see straight.

At least she looks beautiful. It isn’t exactly the wedding dress I always imagined her in—Karina’s a Disney princess type of bride which is why the mermaid gown she chose feels so out of place. She’s modest by nature so all the meshing between the breasts and on the sides was replaced with satin and she had custom sleeves made. She’s wearing our great-grandmother’s diamond earrings and a choker given to her by Brent’s mom. Extensions were put in her hair to create the elegant chignon at the base of her neck and a diadem rests on the crown of her head.

A dazzling, blushing bride if ever there was one. Up close, I can see where the bruise on her upper cheek is fading. The bridal party went ice skating in Rockefeller Center a week ago and she lost her balance, completely face planting into the ice.

Luckily, no one’s noticed or brought any attention to it.

“Hey Dee.” She smiles.

I smile back. “Hey Kay.”

“You look hot.”

“I know.”

All the bridesmaids are wearing different dresses but in the same color. As the maid of honor my distinguishing feature is my bouquet which matches Karina’s. Otherwise, I’m wearing a floor length wine-colored satin gown. Around the waist it’s been cinched and pinned to fit like a second skin. I just know Brent’s sister is pissed I look this good. She wanted to be maid of honor and the dresses were her idea.

I picked the off-shoulder trumpet style she wanted because I really can’t stand her.

“Be my dance partner?” She takes my hands in hers, swinging them back and forth. “I can tell the DJ to put the Dixie Cups song on. We’re going to the chapel and we’re gonna get married.”

I laugh. “Oh my God…we used to love that song when we were little.”

“Remember when my parents used to live in the house on Seneca? The Polish boy who lived next door, Mateusz?” she smiles at the memory. “He used to be our sacrificial groom.”

“I was the officiant,” I make a flourish with my hands. “Best one in New York.”

“And Gina was the flower girl. She recorded the song on her mom’s flip phone and set it as the ringtone so we’d grab the house phone from upstairs and call her over and over again so the song would play while I walked down the driveway between the two houses.”

Tears gather in my eyes and I catch my breath, intense fits of laughter causing my stomach to cramp. “We all remember where we were when Gina’s mom got her Sprint bill at the end of the month!”