Page 63 of Trove’s Purpose

-the more realistic part took notice and got curious.

Because sure, he could be a cartoon style villain just mad that she was mad that he’d do things like flirt with infidelity or not commit himself to her completely. But he had never once asked her to just get over her hang ups on monogamy. He never once told her that she needed to accept him the way he was and just be happy she was his mate at all.

If anything, he always seemed upset when she was upset. He chased her down when she was hurt. He apologized for everything, even if, by her own admission, there was nothing between them so she had no right to demand monogamy.

If she took away the sex thing, if she stopped focusing on that one, huge, glaring difference between them, he’d been a pretty great guy. He was kind, gentlemanly, he respected her boundaries, he didn't make demands of her.

He’d told the brothel maybe later, but he didn't go back. He told Rinnicks he’d think about her offer, but he said he was going to refuse it. If Chee didn't think about how carelessly he viewed sex, he’d been a great person. Everything she could ask for in a man – male.

He was staring at the sand between them now. His face tight with barely concealed annoyance. And all of it directed inward. She could practically hear him cursing himself out in his head.

Like he was trying to explain himself but couldn’t find the words.

Like he was trying to talk but couldn’t make himself speak.

And Chee knew exactly what that was like.

Flashes of her own memories returned to her. And it was like she could feel the heat that had burned her face. She could hear her mother screaming. She could feel her father’s rage.

They all had pasts that might be hard to talk about.

Pasts that left scars. Pasts that might cause specific behaviors. Like making her completely certain sex was something special and meant for one person. Or making him completely certain that sex was meaningless and just another way to pass the time.

Maybe her problem wasn’t that she had a mate that didn't understand her, but that neither of them were understanding the other.

“Trove-”

“Chee-”

They both spoke at the same time, then stopped and looked at each other.

“Sorry,” he said, gesturing. “You go first.”

“No, that’s okay, you go.”

“I insist."

“Really, it’s okay. You first.”

They went back to staring at each other. The air between them heavy and awkward.

Until the first giggle cracked through Chee’s lips. She smacked her hand over her mouth, trying to contain it. But that single break then made him snigger. Then her laugh behind her hand grew. Until they were both laughing at each other.

Nothing was really that funny. But the release of tension had to manifest somehow, and it came out as laughs that made them rock in place. Chee was the one who gathered herself first.

She smiled at him.

He smiled back at her.

“This is… so stupid,” she said.

“I… I agree,” he sighed, shaking his head.

“What are we even doing, Trove?”

“Struggling.”

“Ugh, truth,” she sighed, head dropping back so she could see the starry sky. And sure, the light pollution from behind her meant she didn't see some magnificent starscape, the rings of the planet were still fully visible, so there was a diamond milky way fully visible even now.