Fragments of memory flickered through Mikael’s mind again. Snow, horses, and voices shouting against mountain wind.
His gaze hardened. “What exactly happened on that mountain?”
Dag blinked once. “What?”
“The day I went missing. You told me very little before the antidote, but things are starting to come back now. So explain it to me properly.”
Dag set his glass down harder than necessary. “We were on a hunting expedition, you thought you saw something and had the men fall back. Then you just disappeared.”
“You let me go off by myself?” That certainly wasn’t royal protocol on any outing.
“You thought you saw something…” Dag stammered, clearly not liking the line of questioning.
Mikael snapped his fingers. “A snow cat. I thought there was a snow cat, didn’t I?” Finally it made sense why he kept seeing the animal in his brain.
Dag simply shrugged but didn’t say anything.
Lyra gave a soft bitter laugh. “That is a remarkably convenient version of events. A king just disappears off the top of a mountain and a week later, you know to come banging on my door.”
Dag’s head snapped toward her. “No one asked for your opinion.”
“No,” she replied evenly, “you usually preferred humiliating me rather than listening to me.”
Something cold twisted through Mikael’s chest. Another fragmented memory surfaced at the edges of his mind of school corridors, cruel laughter, and Lyra shrinking away while Dag mocked her openly. Worst of all, Mikael remembered himself standing nearby doing absolutely nothing to stop it.
Shame hit him unexpectedly hard, not merely because Dag had such a bully, but because he had allowed it. The realization left him feeling vaguely sick.
“How did you know to go to her home?” Mikael asked quietly.
Dag stared at him in disbelief. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me.”
“Gods, Mikael, we searched everywhere.” Dag threw one hand upward in frustration. “Her house was just one of many.”
Lyra laughed once under her breath, though there was no humor in it at all. “It really didn’t seem all that random. You already knew he was there. Of that, I’m certain.”
Mikael watched both of them carefully, increasingly certain that something far uglier existed beneath the surface of memories he still could not fully access. Something was wrong. The certainty settled deeper into his bones with every passing second. And for reasons he could not yet explain, his instincts no longer trusted the man standing before him.
Before the silence could sharpen further, Mikael forced himself to refocus. “None of this matters right now while Beckett is still missing.” He pushed himself to his feet fully despite the wave of dizziness that followed almost immediately, and Martin swore under his breath.
“You are in no condition to be joining the search.”
“I am going.”
“You can barely stand.”
Mikael opened his mouth to argue, but Martin stepped closer before he could.
“The treatment is working,” he said carefully. “Your cognition is already improving. Another night will make a significant difference. By morning, we can re-evaluate and see where you stand in your recovery.”
Mikael hated that the man was probably right. His strength still returned unevenly, his body frustratingly unreliable beneath him, and if Beckett truly was alone somewhere in the snow, becoming dead weight during the search would help no one.
Reluctantly, he looked toward Lyra.
“At first light,” he told her, “if the guards aren’t back and I am able, I will go with you myself.”
She studied him uncertainly for a long moment, clearly weighing whether she trusted the promise at all. Considering the memories slowly resurfacing between them, Mikael could not blame her hesitation.