Page 12 of The Scars We Heal

Whitley’s blonde curls were pulled back into little pigtails that bounced as she skipped into the house.

“Hiya!” she squealed, spinning around before latching onto my leg.

“Hello, Miss Whitley.” I patted her head. “Your hair is pretty.”

“Thanks!” It came out more like tanks, and she whipped her head toward Caitlin, saying, “See, Mommy, I’m prettier than you today,” before immediately letting go and running away, heading further into the house.

“Whit!” Caitlin called after her with a laugh, but she was long gone. “I’m so sorry.”

I waved her off. “She’s fine. I don’t have anything she shouldn’t get into.” At least I didn’t think I did. I looked over my shoulder before raising my brows and pursing my lips.

“Mommy!” Whitley yelled. “I found something! Can I keep it?”

“I’m gonna go get her.” She squinted and pointed toward the hallway before brushing past me.

I nodded. “Probably a good idea.”

A muffled, “What did you find?” followed by an, “No, you should put that back, you don’t want that,” rose from the office before Caitlin and Whitley emerged from the hallway.

A chuckle rose from my chest as Caitlin rolled her eyes at her daughter’s antics.

“She’s in her get into everything phase, apparently. She’s so curious and loves learning, so I can’t really be mad, but if she’s in an unfamiliar place and I don’t have an eye on her, I swear she’d get into all sorts of trouble.” She paused for a moment. “Thanks again for inviting us over, even though it was totally unnecessary and probably an inconvenience to you. Sorry about that.”

“Try again,” I said.

“Pardon?”

“You don’t have to apologize. I invited you over because I wanted to. Not as some kind of favor or because I felt like I had to.”

“Sorry.” She defaulted to apologizing again before realizing what she said. “Thank you.”

“That’s better. Come on. I made enough to feed a whole army.” I gestured toward the kitchen and dining table.

CHAPTER FIVE

caitlin

Are you excited? Nervous?” I sat cross-legged on Ellison’s couch, sipping on a glass of wine at her insistence, despite her not being able to drink. Whitley was over at my Mom’s place, and Ellison had invited me over to catch up. The last time I’d seen her in person was Thanksgiving when I made an impromptu trip to Montana because Adam went away on business and didn’t tell me he was going to be leaving prior.

Her due date was a little over a month away, but I could tell she was ready to be done with her pregnancy. Even at thirty-four weeks pregnant, she had a glow about her. She certainly didn’t look as tired as I knew I did when I was pregnant.

Despite all this, she still heaved out a sigh.

“Yes,” she replied. “Yes, to both.”

I stifled a soft laugh, understanding what she was feeling. “It’s an exciting time. I’m happy for you and Colter.”

She placed a hand on her swollen belly. “Thanks. I’ve been lucky to have an easy pregnancy. But it’s still a little nerve-wracking. How did you get through it with Whit?”

My nose scrunched involuntarily as I thought about my pregnancy. It wasn’t really something I talked about with people other than my therapist. I didn’t want to be a source of anxiety for Ellison, but I could tell she wanted my honest answer in the way she worried at her lip.

“It wasn’t easy,” I admitted.

Not only was the pregnancy tough, but getting pregnant to begin with was hard, too. Adam and I tried for years, and with every negative test, a little bit of my hope of starting a family flickered out. Perhaps it was the universe trying to tell me he was the wrong person to be with, but I wouldn’t have traded having my daughter for the world.

When we finally did get pregnant and Whitley was born, I was so exhausted. I honestly couldn’t remember the first three or four months of her life because I was trying to adjust to life with a newborn and a husband who never carried any of the weight.

I was sure my mom and Colter remembered more about that time than I did. It was devastating, but through it all, Whitley was the light and love of my life. She made everything brighter. In the solar system of my universe, she was the sun, and I was so glad I made it out of that darkness.