Page 119 of Bless My Body

I walk into my bedroom and find Celine sitting on the edge of my bed. One of her knees is

bouncing, signaling to me she’s nervous about whatever she’s here for. Or maybe the caffeine is

hitting her a little too hard. I shut my door behind me, hoping it would keep Sadie from

eavesdropping.

“Is everything ok?” I ask after a few moments of silence. She’s just looking at me, from my feet

and all the way up my body until they land right on my confused face.

“Everything is good. Great even. I missed you and wanted to talk to you—in person.”

“Ok.” I sit down on the bed next to her. She missed me. I don’t want to get my hopes up, but damn,

it feels good hearing that.

“I’m sorry,” she spits out quickly. “I got scared. I felt myself having these crazy feelings for you,

and it freaked me the fuck out.”

I won’t pretend that my heart doesn’t speed up when she tells me she has feelings for me, but I try

my best to keep my face unmoved. I need to let her get this out.

“I think because I care for you so much as a friend, I already had strong feelings for you. But then

you gave me your body, and you did unbelievable things to mine. It just intensified everything I was

trying to push away.” She’s nervous, and I want to reach out and grab her hand to comfort her, but I

don’t. I want her to finish her speech and tell me what she wants.

“I never thought I would want a boyfriend, especially not now when I feel like my life is just

starting. But I can’t stop thinking about you, Ez, and how perfect we are together.”

I feel like I’m walking into a trap. I’m just waiting on a ‘but’ to drop.

“But.” There it is. “I’m scared.”

“What are you scared of?” I can’t say I’ve ever had anyone tell me they’re scared to be with me.

“I’m scared I’m going to feel like I’m losing my independence.”

“Celine, if we were together, I would never try to take that away from you. I know how you are. If

you need time by yourself, or with your girls, or just somewhere away from me, I would completely

understand that. I love that you’re so independent. I would rather you want me than need me, you

know?”

“I’m realizing that now, but I’m still scared.” I finally move my hand to rest on hers, and she

watches my movements with intensity. Her knee stops bouncing when I touch her.

When her hazel eyes meet mine again, she doesn’t look any more relaxed. “What if… what if I’m