Page 10 of Bittersweet Redemption

We head back to the house, where we have dinner and bath time and get him into bed. He’s exhausted after so much running, so he falls asleep right after story time.

I pour myself a glass of wine from the cheapest bottle I could find at the store and go out back. The last renters left some chairs on the patio so I can sit out here on nights like tonight. My head tilts up to the stars, and I think about what Kayla said today. Normally I don’t have time to think about dating. But the longer I’ve been separated from Nick, the more I miss having a partner. I miss having a physical release with someone besides myself.

Maybe I could look into joining a dating app or something. I come with a lot of baggage, but I don’t need anything serious. Just something to get me comfortable putting myself out there again. Are practice dates a thing?

I glance over to the dark house next door. He must work nights because he always seems to be home in the mornings, and his house is completely dark at night. Not that I’m stalking him or anything, just little things I’ve noticed.

Why do I notice these things? I don’t know. I try to pretend he’s not there, but he’s a hard man to ignore. For some reason, he intrigues me, even though he can’t stand me.

I take a sip of my wine and decide that I’ve got to move on. I need to put myself out there. I need to find a good guy who will love both me and Roman. There’s got to be someone out there for us. I also need to look for any red flags because, unfortunately, I think I have a thing for guys who aren’t good for me.

Why did I get blessed with such shitty taste in men?

Chapter 6

Willa

It’s Roman’s weekend with his dad.

He doesn’t want to go as much as I don’t want him to, either.

Part of the custody agreement Nick and I came up with states that he has to spend every other weekend with his dad. He never wants to go. I’ve explained it over and over to Roman, but a five-year-old’s brain can’t compute why he has to go somewhere he doesn’t want to.

The first time Nick picked Roman up from our new house, I could tell he was mad, maybe even a little jealous, that we were doing so well without him. But this time, he seems to have his emotions under control a little better. He looks cool, calm, and collected, just like the Nick that swooped me up when I needed it most.

As much as I want to keep Roman locked up in the house with me, I put my big girl pants on, hug and kiss Roman, and wave goodbye as he climbs in the back of his dad’s car. Nick’s brother Jake is in the car too. He usually is. Jake and Nick aren’t just brothers; they’re best friends. Wherever Nick and I went, Jake usually followed. I got used to it after a while, but it was definitely annoying in the beginning of our relationship.

Nick shuts Roman’s door and leans against it. “You look good, Willa.”

His eyes roam my body, and it makes me feel dirty. He saw me two weeks ago, and I know I haven’t changed much in that time, so I assume he must be feeling lonely. Or he’s trying to see how weak I am—to see how quickly I’ll come running back to him if he shows me the slightest attention.

“You know you’re welcome at the house any time. You can come home, and we can be a family again. No more being away from Roman for the weekend.”

Home. I may have grown up with Nick, but the house we shared was never a home. While it felt safe the first year or two with him, I quickly realized it was more a prison than a home. Yet I stayed way longer than I should have.

“This is my home now, Nick.”

He smirks. “Come on, baby. How long are you gonna keep this up?” He calls me baby like I’m still his girl.

“Keep what up?” I cross my arms over my chest.

“This whole separation thing.” Separation thing? He thinks I’ll change my mind and run back into his arms. While I’ll admit I miss the idea of him, the reality is not worth it. “You know we’re endgame. Why don’t you cut this out and come home.”

I shake my head. “We’re over, Nick. For real.”

“If we’re over, why haven’t you moved on? It’s been a year, and you haven’t been with anyone else.”

Shit. I was hoping he hadn’t noticed. “I’m focusing on myself and Roman. And just because I haven’t been dating doesn’t mean I’m not over you.”

He pushes off the car, the smirk still painted on his lips. “Ok, baby. You keep telling yourself that. I’ll be waiting when you decide to come around.” He stares at me for a minute, and when I don’t say anything, he rounds the car and slides into the driver’s seat.

I exhale as the car drives off and stand at the end of my driveway, watching until I can’t see the tail lights anymore. I choose to ignore everything Nick just said and focus on my son. It’s just two nights. I can handle two nights without my baby.

I finally turn to head back inside and see Kai standing in his driveway, leaning casually against the side of his car. It surprises me that he’s standing there. He almost looks like he wants to talk, which can’t be right because I’m pretty sure he would rather do anything else than talk to me.

He nods his head at Nick’s car as it drives off. “Where’s he going?”

“It’s his weekend with his dad.”