Page 26 of AJ’s Fire

“Casey’s here.” Emily’s tone was accusatory.

“Yeah, she said she’d meet me here. You guys were going to get dressed together or whatever.”

“Yeah, no, I mean, why is Casey here?”

I handed over one of the bottles as I leaned in to kiss Emily on the cheek. “Don’t start, Ems.” I adjusted my voice to a whisper even though we were alone in the foyer. “What happened to ‘everyone comes out at their own pace’? I’m just not ready.”

“You’re just not ready to stop pining over your best friend, more like.” Emily raised up on her toes and peered over my shoulder. “Where are the Gordon brothers?”

“Good question,” I said, pulling out my phone. “Not here yet?”

As if on cue, my phone pinged, but it was a notification from Guys4Guys. Emily tried to peek, but I maneuvered around her as Ruth came barreling down the hall in a bathrobe.

“Jackson!” She ran up and hugged me. “It’s so good to see you again. Oh, shit, you look good!”

“Oh, shit?”

“Yeah, look at you in that suit. And Ems all sparkly. She’s been trying to talk me into a little black dress, but …”

From Emily’s room I heard, “Come on, girls, I need someone to zip me up!”

With another kiss on the cheek Emily grabbed Ruth by the arm, and they headed back down the hall. “You are wearing the black one!”

“Hi, girls,” I mumbled to myself. “Happy New Year.” I poured myself a drink and sat. I was about to open the Guys4Guys app when a text popped up.

Coffee Trainer: Running late. Ok if we meet you at the restaurant?

Probie: Sure

I switched over to the app to find a long message from Newbie1164, the guy I’d been texting with for a few weeks but hadn’t had the nerve to ask out.

Newbie1164: Happy New Year’s Eve! I hope you’re doing something fun. I’m going out with a group of friends who think they’re going to set me up with a friend of theirs. A woman, of course. I wish I’d had the courage to ask you out for New Year’s Eve. I’m headed up north tomorrow. To Cedar Lake. I was so surprised when you said your grandparents had a place there. I was thinking, maybe if you weren’t busy, we could meet up there, away from the city. It’s not too far a drive, or I could pick you up at the train station if you don’t have a car. I just feel like I’m always looking over my shoulder, even typing this. We could meet at a bar or something …

I stared at the phone, wondering what I wanted. I mean, I knew I wanted AJ, but that was out of the question, and the whole point of being on Guys4Guys was for me to find someone to explore my sexuality with. Another person struggling to come out and interested in meeting away from the prying eyes of my friends was the perfect setup. So why was I still so apprehensive? Just because I agreed to meet the guy didn’t mean I had to go through with anything. Newbie had been easy to talk with over text. Maybe there would be a spark, or maybe we’d just each find a friend we could relate to who was going through the same thing. I formed my response.

HotJake005: Happy New Year to you. I would be happy to meet you. I have a car, and my family’s cabin is on the lake. I’ll drive up and text you when I’m there.

With only a slight hesitation, I followed it up by texting the address of my grandparents’ cabin. They were already south for the winter along with my parents, spending time at our estate in Costa Rica.

I stared at my phone, waiting for a reply, thinking about how I should be anxious or nervous to meet Newbie. But my thoughts kept turning to AJ. It was as if Newbie was some afterthought or task that I had to check off my list.

Emily, Ruth, and Casey came out of the bedroom a minute later, all three in black dresses and high heels.

I stood as Casey approached. She punched me in the arm. “Hey, buddy. You clean up good.” She hugged me then and whispered in my ear, “I don’t know what Emily’s up to, but I’m still not interested in what you have to offer if you get my meaning.” She pulled back and smiled at me.

I smiled back. “Just a bunch of friends hanging out on New Year’s Eve. Got it.”

“I haven’t seen you around the bar for a while, so I have to say I was surprised when you asked me along tonight.” I tilted my head at her. “Okay, when Emily asked me on your behalf.” Casey leaned in again. “What’s she up to?”

“Fuck if I know,” I said as Emily approached us and handed me a bottle of champagne to open.

After a few drinks, we headed to the restaurant, which turned out to be an eclectic place with great energy.

“Welcome to Bounty’s Kitchen. Two members of your party are already here. Let me take you to them.”

As the maître d’ asked us to follow him toward the back of the establishment, a surge of nervous energy shot through me. I could feel my heart palpitating, and I began running my hands down my thighs. My phone vibrated in my pocket, but the nerves had started before the familiar buzz that meant I had a notification from Guys4Guys.

I had stepped back to allow the women to go ahead, but as Emily walked past, she took one look at me and linked her arm in mine instead.