Page 26 of Josh’s Play

I waited for the crowd to move ahead, then instead of responding to his text, I jogged up next to him, tucking my phone and my hands in my coat pockets. Before I could reach him, he gave up his visible search, looking at his phone once more as he followed at a distance behind the group.

My footsteps must have been drowned out by the excited crowd in front of us because I had to pull up next to Cam before he looked up and right at me with a smile so dazzling, it practically lit up the dark area we were traversing. He looked like an absolute movie star in his tight-fitting suit and tie, a stark contrast to the sweats and T-shirts I was used to seeing him in. It gave him a presence as he towered over me, a confidence devoid of the usual stressful subtext. I was drawn to him even more than usual, the Guys4Guys app all but forgotten as I smiled in return.

“Hi,” he breathed.

I took in his smile. I had to fist my hands in my pockets not to reach out and touch his cheek, the desire to capture it, to memorize it and then to kiss it off his face a physical thing that I had to fight not to do.

“Hey,” I said back, and I thought I saw his own hand twitch at his side. “Good game.”

“Yeah, thanks. It was.” I looked him up and down. He was simply stunning.

He acknowledged my obvious gaze by flicking his tie. “Oh yeah, the suit.” He shrugged as if he was embarrassed or uncomfortable. “It’s tradition. I hate it. I grew up on a farm, you know. This thing makes my skin crawl.”

It was making my skin crawl, too, but not in any kind of pejorative way. I really wanted to tell him how hot he looked, but I didn’t want to make him more uncomfortable, so I simply muttered, “It looks good on you.”

We started walking side by side, following the crowd but not making an effort to catch up. He surprised me by asking, “Yeah?”

It felt like permission, so I rolled my eyes at him and started with a joke before confessing the truth. “Yeah, it really suits you, but come on, you must know how hot you look!”

He shoulder checked me. “Shut up, nerd.”

He was so much bigger than me that I lost my balance for a second, and he reached out, wrapping a big hand around my waist to steady me. We caught each other’s eyes, and his look was no joke. I knew he was conflicted, and I was trying my best to keep my own emotions in check, but it was damn hard when I was staring up at a sexy, besuited puppy dog, that crazy mix of confidence and conflict that he exuded enrapturing me.

“You sure it’s okay that I come over?” I thought it best to change the subject, and I was genuinely confused as to why he’d invited me back to the Hockey House, where we would be surrounded by his teammates and friends, me the short, preppy stranger in their mix.

“Yeah, yes, of course? I mean, we’re friends, right? Besides, it will be good for the project. Give you some background into the guys, the team. What it’s like after a win. It’ll … It’ll be fun.”

I tried to lean in and shoulder Cam like he’d done to me, but he was so much taller that all I did was bounce myself off of him and almost lose my balance again. Cam grabbed my upper arm to steady me, and we ended up face-to-face, or, well, face to chest, with Cam grasping my arm tightly.

“Fun,” I croaked in response as I had meant to when I leaned into him.

“Josh?”

“Yeah?”

He looked to his left at the crowd laughing and cheering as they moved further and further away from us, hurrying to their destination and out of the cold.

“I …”

“Cam, it’s okay …” was all I got out before he slid his fingers down my arm and held my hand. He looked back one more time before taking off in the opposite direction, dragging me behind him.

I couldn’t help but look back, worried Cam’s teammates would see us running off holding hands. “Cam?” I questioned, working hard to keep up while looking toward Cam, then over my shoulder once again to point at the team.

“Party’s that way, Finn.”

We were back at the deserted arena, near the door Cam had just exited. “Cam, where are we going?”

“I don’t … I don’t know.” He sighed, leaning on the door and slumping his shoulders. “I just … I don’t know. I just …”

“Hang on.” I pulled my phone out and found my text chain with my roommate.

Josh: You still good if I head back to the room?

Dev: Did you get hit on at the hockey game?

Josh: Maybe.

I took one look at Cam’s stressed-out face and amended my answer.