Page 40 of Playing With Love

“Things change, Jay. She’s not who she used to be.”

“And you are?”

No, I’d changed plenty in the last decade. If you were smart, you took the lessons life offered and you learned and grew from them.

“To her…for her…yes, I’m the same man I’ve always been. I get you think you’re doing me a favor with this talk, but trust me, you’re not. I thought with her being here, we’d finally have our time. She made it clear she’s of a different mind. So, now, that’s done and she’s still here. You can take from that, I’m not best pleased. I just want this case done so I can be done, and she can be on her way.”

“She made it clear?” Jason inquired, not catching I seriously didn’t want to talk about this.

“Crystal,” I confirmed.

“That doesn’t jibe with what Lenox said last night.”

Obviously, Liza’s late-night call was spurred from whatever conversation she’d had with Lenox. That didn’t bode well for me. Next up would be Lenox for another unpleasant chat I wanted to have only slightly more than I wanted to shove my dick in a meat grinder.

“I don’t know what to say about that, Jason. What I do know is I’d like this conversation to be done. Not only because it’s a waste of time, but being real with you, it fucking kills knowing she’s close, knowing I was holding out for her, thinking one day somehow she’d be my future, to now knowing she’ll never be anything but a memory. And right now, she’s a memory I don’t want.”

“Fuck, Tucker, I didn’t mean⁠—”

“I know you didn’t. It’s all good or it will be when she’s gone. I can stop hiding in my office and driving out to Jesup to go to the fucking gym.”

The lie rolled off my tongue in a way I hoped would be convincing.

It wasn’t good and I knew damn well it wouldn’t be when she left. It would only get worse. The sting of her being gone, this time with no hope of seeing her again, was going to bleed for a good long while.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

“I know you didn’t. It’s all good or it will be when she’s gone. I can stop hiding in my office and driving out to Jesup to go to the fucking gym.”

Tucker’s words felt like a dull blade sawing through my insides. Each pass mangling flesh instead of slicing clean.

I knew when I woke up with a hangover from hell I should’ve stayed in bed and worked from my hotel room.

Three drinks with Carter and two more alone at the hotel bar to get the courage to call Tucker had been three too many.

And I probably would’ve stayed in bed if Shannon hadn’t called to ask if I’d seen the seminar cancellation and what my thoughts were on a secondary plan. Since I didn’t know anything about the cancellation until Shannon had told me, I didn’t have a secondary plan or thoughts on how I was going to get an invite to a retreat, or better yet, the compound.

“Good, you’re here,” Carter said from behind me, and like the eavesdropper I was, I flinched at his much too loud voice.

I had yet to come up with a practical solution—say like sprint past Carter and exit stage left or right or however the hell that stupid saying went. Perhaps turn and smile and pretend I hadn’t been listening in on Tucker’s private conversation. Fake being lost and looking for the restroom might’ve worked, too, but I didn’t get the chance to do anything before Tucker came to the door and caught me.

“Um, yeah, just got here.”

Tucker narrowed his eyes at my lie.

Shit.

“And you thought you’d creep in my doorway?”

Ass. Hole.

“I wasn’t creeping. I was walking down the hall.”

Tucker looked to his left where the hall ended about fifteen feet from his office door, making his point without words.

“To see if you were in your office,” I rushed to add, which was the truth, just not all of it. “Shannon called me.”

“Dylan and Nick are waiting in the conference room,” Carter thankfully rejoined.