Page 123 of Kyle

“Anaya, sweetheart, the life you had tells me you’re gonna be a good one.”

“But—”

“Didn’t want to bring this up, didn’t wanna remind you or talk about it, and after this we’re going back to moving forward and leaving the past where it belongs—in the fucking past. If anyone understands the importance of the role a mother plays in a child’s life, it’s you. If anyone knows what it feels like to be uncared for, it’s you. If anyone knows what it is like not to have a mama to love them, cuddle them, kiss them goodnight, it is you. You knowing all of that, living the life you did, going through what you did, and you being the type of woman I know you are—and I know it down to my bones—you’ll bust your ass to make sure your child never feels a moment of what you did. That’s how I know.”

Tears had formed in Anaya’s eyes and I felt each one as they rolled down her cheek and ricocheted through my chest—another direct hit. This one straight to my heart.

“Anaya, you are strong and brave and can do anything you put your mind to. Any damn thing. Believe that. You may’ve missed it, but you’re tight with your girls. You’ve connected with them and with my team. They all love and care about you and that has nothing to do with you being my woman and everything to do with you just being you. You have a heart of gold and one day, you’re gonna pass all of that, all of who you are, on to our kids.”

“Thank you.”

“For what? Telling you the truth.”

“Well, yes, but also for always reassuring me and reminding me when I forget I’m supposed to be fearless.”

“It is no hardship standing by your side. It is an honor and there’s no place I’d rather be. I’ll remind you every day until you remember on your own. And, sweetheart, you aren’t ‘supposed’ to be fearless—you just are. When I say you can do anything, Anaya, I mean anything. It’s taken you only a month, a fuckin’ month, to shed your armor and shine. One goddamn month. I’m beyond awestruck. Beyond words to tell you how proud I am of you.”

“Do you think everything is moving too fast?”

“Fuck no. Honest to God, swear I’m telling you the truth, I knew when you walked into the lobby of The Del, you were going to change my life. I knew the second my eyes landed on you and my skin tingled with awareness that something big was gonna happen. I knew it. And when we were in Australia and you stood tall and fierce in front of me telling me to stop treating you like you were broken, I knew I was falling in love with you. Right then, with that steely look of determination, I knew with every fiber of my being that you were the woman I was going to spend my life with. So, no, this isn’t moving too fast. As far as I’m concerned, we’re moving at a snail’s pace. If I had my way, you’d have my ring on your finger and planning a wedding. But I know you need time to adjust and—”

“I don’t need time.”

And there was that fierceness I loved so much.

The resolve and honesty.

“Then when we get home, I’ll set about making it so you have a wedding to plan. And just so you know, I don’t want to wait. I don’t want some long engagement. I also don’t care when and where. Rally your girls, set it up, and tell me where I’m supposed to show up.”

“You don’t care when and where?”

There was that cute scrunch of her nose again. The one that never failed to make me want to kiss the ever-loving hell out of her.

“Okay, I’ll amend. I don’t care when, as long as it’s soon. I don’t care where as long as it is exactly what you want. You’ve given me something I never dreamed I’d have because I didn’t know to dream for it. I didn’t know you were out there wandering around. And I sure as fuck didn’t know that all this time, I was waiting for you. But I was, and now that I know, I don’t want to wait any longer because I’ve already waited thirty-two years for you.” Anaya nodded, streams of tears now flowing. “Baby, you’re killing me.”

My hands moved from her waist to her cheeks and I swiped the wetness away.

“They’re happy tears, Kyle,” she whispered, her eyes still brimming with tears. “And just so you know, I was thinking the same thing. Only I was thinking how lucky I was. How I never thought about the future or what it would look like because there was nothing worth looking forward to. Then I met you. Then I fell in love with you. And now, I want things I never dared to think about, and one of those things is kids. Because for me to have a family it would mean I’d have to find a man, and I never thought that would happen. I wasn’t looking for you, Kyle. I wasn’t looking for a future or love or even friends. I was content living behind the walls I’d reinforced and I stopped noticing the loneliness. Then you made me see myself differently and suddenly and it happened quickly. I didn’t want to live like I was. I wanted to invite you in, I wanted you to want to stay awhile, I wanted everything I never thought I’d have and I only want it with you.

“You said it took me a month to shed my armor but you’re wrong, I didn’t shed it, honey, you demolished it. You tore it to shreds and you did it on an airplane by just holding my hand.”

My chest expanded, not with air, even though I was breathing heavy, but from something so big building up, I thought I’d shatter.

“Fuck, baby, you cannot say shit like that to me when the movers are gonna be here in five minutes, your bed’s already disassembled, and your couch is covered in suitcases.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” She smiled and tilted her head in a way that left me no option but to lean down and take her mouth.

And like always, my girl didn’t mess around, her tongue came out to meet mine and she swept me away into another world. One where only she and I existed. One that was so fucking bright and beautiful it didn’t just fill me with hope—it filled me with pure joy.

The knock at the door ended our kiss far too soon.

“Tonight when we get back to our hotel room, I’m gonna show you just how much your words mean to me. I’m gonna take my time, I’m gonna do it thoroughly, and I’m gonna do it in a way that you’ll never forget. I love you, Anaya. So damn much I can’t begin to tell you. But I promise you, even though I can’t find the words, you’ll always know. And you’ll feel it from top to toe, you’ll feel it in your heart, you’ll feel it in your soul. I swear it, sweetheart, your days of living behind walls are over. You tore those down and built yourself a home. And knowing I’m the one that gets to fill it with family and happiness is the best feeling in the world.”

Anaya did a face plant into my chest, my arms went around her as her body shook. I knew she was crying, her tears were soaking my tee, but these I’d let seep into my skin knowing she liked what I said and she was feeling my promise deep.

The pounding on the door sounded again and I didn’t move. Fuck it. The movers could wait.

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