Page 2 of XO Karma

Fifty bucks isn’t even enough to buy the quantity of eggs needed for that punishment in this economy.

Karma Request #2457

Crime: I was cut off at a red light and they flipped ME off

Evidence: Dash cam video

Preferred Punishment: Slash their tires

Payment Offered: $50

How To Find The Target: [Shown after job is accepted]

Are people broke, or do they have no value in the outsourcing of illegal activities? Possibly both.

The second two listings aren’t nearly enough to pay my half of the bills. And the first one… well, just no. The evidence is damning, but more research would be required before enacting any type of punishment.

Frustrated with my lack of options, I let a heavy breath escape me, and my gaze wanders out the large bay window overlooking the river. The midday sun dances across the water, reminding me why the view is my favorite feature of this house. This very beautiful, three-story, old Victorian style, expensive house I share with my twin brother, Liam. As costly as the upkeep is, the memories held in its walls make it impossible to let go.

My eyes fall to the love seat by the window, and a smile spreads across my face as a favorite one comes to mind. My best friend Violet and I curled up at age twelve, reading old Goosebumps novels, picking our own scares for hours until the sun was long gone and we had nothing left but a dim lamp to illuminate our adventures.

A pang twists in my chest, and I shake it away.

No time for reminiscing.

My attention travels back to the device before me. Today’s options may not be perfect, but I’m in the mood for revenge, and if requester 2455’s husband really is a cheating dickwad, he’s the most deserving.

I type a quick counterproposal through the messaging function of the website I’ve coded. It’s fully encrypted from end to end, and the NSA would be impressed, if I do say so myself. At least something productive has come out of my master’s in computer science. I’ve even enabled an automation to make payments untraceable. The customer sends the money in USD, and the system purchases crypto. Then it’s sent to my wallet and automatically sold for USD.

I ponder the value of this particular punishment, add an amount, then hit send.

Karma Request #2455

Karma’s Suggested Punishment: Photos of the affair will be anonymously leaked to the company of employment. Social media from your husband will be hacked, and the evidence will be shared for family and friends to see.

Payment Requested: $500

That should make it easy enough for her to negotiate a hefty alimony in the divorce. Worth way more than $500, but I promised to keep this affordable. In the beginning I even did it for free, but Liam, the only person who knows about my alter ego, suggested how many more people could get their revenge if I made it my full-time thing. And damn was he right.

Turns out allowing people to hire out their revenge fantasies is almost priceless. Almost being the operative word. Some of the truly outrageous requests I get from trust fund nepo babies could keep me fed for years. You want Daddy’s Lambo blown up for $50,000 because he had the audacity to tell you to get a job? Tempting, but no. Unfortunately for them, I may love lining my pockets, but I also have a conscience.

Because Karma without conscience is just a boat without a sail.

While business is booming, there’s simply too little time to fulfill every ask. With recon and other leg work, I’m lucky to complete one to three a week. Another reason why as much as I’d love to toss rotten eggs at some loser’s house, I must prioritize the customers who pay my bills.

Hiring help has been considered, but it’s not something I can just post in the local classifieds. What the hell would I say?

Hi, commercialized karma company in search of nosy little bitch to assist in recon and verifying damning information. Tasks include but are not limited to computer research, website design, hacking, stalking, role play, breaking and entering…

That likely wouldn’t do anything other than raise flags to local law enforcement, and considering my brother is a detective at the precinct in our neighborhood, I don’t want him covering for me any more than he already is.

The laptop’s speaker chimes, informing me of a new notification.

Karma Request #2455

Counterproposal accepted.

How To Find The Target: His name is Richard Downing. Hers is Cynthia White. She lives at 1827 Flowal Road, Cleosville, New York. Any time after 10pm. That’s when Rich sneaks out of the house since he thinks I’m asleep with the baby.