Page 109 of Love Lessons: Expanded Edition

Chapter 21

Dustin

Dustin buzzed Landon’s apartment, wondering when everything had gone wrong. He’d been trying so hard to avoid smothering him, but it felt like Landon was slipping through his fingers.

Landon had claimed to be committed to him, but two months had passed, and things only felt more tentative. He’d thought he was doing things right, but he feared he’d messed up horrifically.

Today it had all come to a head. It was Landon’s big meeting with the district folks, and Dustin didn’t know how it had gone. He’d texted a query, but Landon had just said he didn’t know.

Then he’d asked if he could come over, and Landon said he didn’t care.

Those were his exact words. “I don’t care.”

Dustin should have known it was coming. What else could he expect from caging in such a wild and free creature?

The door buzzed and he rode the slow elevator, realizing that he wasn’t in any hurry for it to go faster.

Landon had left his apartment door slightly ajar, as he usually did after buzzing someone in. He only had the flashing light hooked up to the intercom system for the outside entrance and hadn’t bothered installing one for the hallway.

When Dustin poked his head in, he expected Landon to be waiting for him, or at least visible. His apartment wasn’t large, and the doorway opened up into the kitchen and living room. He thought he might be in the bathroom, but he couldn’t hear water running. In fact, he didn’t hear anything at all.

He decided to look for him in the more public areas first and didn’t have to look hard. Landon was laying on the couch, his face pressed into the cushions.

Dustin’s heart tugged in his chest. Landon was always so strong and vibrant. Even when he was tired he would always at least explain what was going on.

Hiding his face wasn’t like him at all. His whole body was slack, like he didn’t have the energy to move. And he was wearing the loose-fitting khakis and button-down that said he hadn’t changed when he got home from work.

It looked like the meeting with the superintendent hadn’t gone well, which unfortunately wasn’t surprising. If the district cared at all about Landon’s program, they would have fixed it long ago.

Or was Landon sick? Hurt? Exhausted? Dustin ached to be able to take care of him, to take all of his worries away and give him what he needed.

He reached out to touch him when another thought occurred to him. Had he done this? Was he the cause? Was this Landon’s way of saying that he was done with the wannabe Dom and unwanted boyfriend that Dustin had tried to be?

Dustin knelt down beside the couch and paused before he touched him. He wanted to savor the way that his long hair tangled over his collar and the muscles of his back expanded into his shirt with each breath.

In case it was the last time.

He touched Landon’s shoulder, but didn’t get a response.

Giving in to his impulses, he stroked Landon’s hair, untangling it from around his ears.

Landon shrugged him off.

Was that it? Was he just supposed to leave?

No, he at least wanted an explanation. He’d ended things too hastily the first time, and he wasn’t going to let it go that easily now.

He shook Landon’s shoulder, not enough to hurt him but enough to say that he wasn’t going away.

Landon grunted and turned his head just enough to face him. He glared.

Dustin met his glare and tried to keep his face impassive. If this was the end, he could at least see it through with dignity. Can you tell me what’s going on? he finally asked.

Landon closed his eyes, effectively ending the conversation.

Seriously? Dustin shook his shoulder again, not stopping until that crystal glare was fastened on him. Try again. What’s going on?

Landon lifted one hand from by his side, formed it into an O, waved it through the air, and let it drop again. Nothing. His eyes closed.