Page 71 of View With Your Heart

“Gee, have you ever tried to get in touch with someone famous? It’s not easy.” Gee nods as though he understands, but I don’t know if he does. “The point is, now I know, and I’d like to be in your life.”

“But you live in California.” He’s stating the obvious, and I’m just as stumped at the moment what that means.

“I do. I was thinking you could come to visit me, or maybe I could come to visit you.” Britton falls back, crossing her arms as she stares at me over her kitchen table. She chews at her lip as this is the first she’s heard my thoughts. Just yesterday, I was considering visiting home more often, possibly moving here, but now, I just don’t know what to do.

“For now, I’m here, and I’d like to spend some time with you.”

“For how long?” Gee asks, and the questions surprise me. “For how long will you stay here?” His voice rises a little, and I look at Britton as I’m sensing I’m missing something.

“Gee, tell us what you’re thinking.”

“Dad was only around for nine years. How long will Gavin live?”

Jesus, what?

“Honey, Gavin isn’t sick like Patrick was. He’s perfectly healthy.” She glances at me to confirm, and I nod.

“I don’t really know where to go from here, buddy. I want to be a part of your life, if you’ll let me, that’s all I know. And I have a big family so that means they want you as part of their life also.”

Gee stares at me and then looks at his mom. I wish I could read all his thoughts, but I imagine it’s difficult to absorb. I’m struggling. Gee is amazing. I’m proud to be his father, and I want to get to know him better. I want to be his dad. My struggle is with Britton. I don’t know how to categorize her. I don’t know where she fits because as much as I fight it, she’s more than just Gee’s mom to me.

“You’re Holden’s uncle, right?”

“Yes,” I clarify. “Which means Holden is your cousin. So are his sisters, Meghan and Madison. Karyn and Tom are your aunt and uncle, like my brother Ethan is your uncle. Soon, he’ll marry Ella, and she will be your aunt.”

“Are you and mom getting married?” His tone turns more hopeful as he glances between the two of us, and I swallow on how to answer.

“Your mom and I have a lot to work out.” I’d love to explain how relationships take trust, and I don’t trust her right now. I don’t trust her to be honest with me, and relationships involve honesty as well.

“But you like each other. I mean, I saw you kissing her at the wedding and holding her hand.”

I slowly nod. “Yeah, buddy, I like her.” I look over at Britton, who swipes tears off her cheeks.

“And you really liked her if you had sex with her.”

“Gee,” Britton shrieks, her expression shifting to a scowl.

“Well, you told me sex was how babies are made, and sex should only happen when two people love each other. Did you love each other?”

Holy crap, this kid.

“Yeah, I loved your mom,” I admit. “I still do, but it’s a little different now.”

“How is it different?” he questions.

“Well, don’t you love . . . like your best friend. Loving a friend isn’t like loving a girl. You love your mom, right? But that’s also not the same as loving a girl. There are different types of love.” I’m pretty proud of my explanation and glance at Britton for approval.

“And you don’t love Mom enough to marry her?” he questions.

“Gee, Gavin has a lot to sort out just like us. He just learned the truth, and things like marrying someone take time. I’m not saying we will marry someday. I’m just saying marriage isn’t what we are talking about today. We are talking about you. Telling you that Gavin is your father, and he’d like to get to know you.”

“Can you coach my baseball team like Coach Carter does for Holden?”

“Well, I . . .” I pause, glancing at Britton. “I think the position is covered for this year. Your season is almost over, and you’re going to Cooperstown soon.”

Shit. That’s right, he has that trip coming up.

“Are you going with us?”