Page 55 of Good Girls Beg

I was starting to get the impression he knew me better than he should have. As if he'd peeled back my skin and looked underneath. As though somehow he'd been watching me for a long time and learning all about me. The idea gave me the heebie-jeebies. I'd already accused Oak of being a stalker. Should I be more wary of Helmut Egger as well?

"I should let you get to work," I said, stepping away from him.

He glanced at his watch and adjusted it, before giving a single brief nod. "Be at home when I get there." He offered no explanation.

He walked around behind his desk, lowered himself into his leather chair, opened his laptop and redirected his focus from me to it.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

OAK

I'd seen Teddie and Hel enter the company office building from the front seat of my car. Was she was aware he had his hand close to her back? Wanting to touch her but not stepping over that invisible line?

A line, knowing him as well as I did, he considered imaginary.

Fuck that.

There was nothing imaginary about it. That line was a hundred percent there. If I could draw it, it would resemble a big circle, all the way around her. A six-foot-tall, circular brick wall, if I had my way. A tower would work perfectly. One with one door in and out. The only person with a key? Me.

I let out a frustrated breath. Okay, I didn't want to lock her away, I'm not that fucked up. Mostly.

No, I wanted her to realize I existed. I wanted to go back to the night at Vertical and do it over again. Change the ending.

What would I do differently, though? I didn't fucking know. Would I do what she’d wanted? Fuck her up against that car? It would have been so easy. Should have been so fucking easy. If those assholes hadn't interrupted…

Except I knew why they did. I wanted to, but couldn't hate them for it. Not when they knew what would have happened if I'd given in. Lost control. Fucked her when she had no idea who I was. Even now that she did, I didn't think I could give it to her. But I wanted to. Badly.

So fucking much, I spent every night since she moved in, with my hand wrapped around my cock. I fell asleep that way and woke up with my fingers cramped. My balls so tight they hurt.

The other day, when I threatened to find out for myself if she was wearing panties, I knew she wouldn't let me. There was no risk in a threat like that. None to me, anyway. It was empty, like my soul.

She couldn't know that though. It pissed her off. The flash of anger in her eyes…

"You're a fuck-up,” I said to myself.

I ignored the woman who walked past me and finished my maintenance check on the security of the grocery store. Everything was in working order. The only person who was getting past this system was me. Maybe Hel. He knew this shit as well as I did. Fade liked to think he did but he knew jack shit. He was the numbers guy. He should stick to that. Asshole. He thought I didn't know what he did last night with my woman.

I knew. What he did almost fucking killed me. It should've been me getting her off. If it wasn't for…

"Is everything okay?" Rachel, the owner of the grocery store, appeared in front of me, her pixie face looking up at me. She was cute enough but she wasn't Teddie. Not to mention, her boyfriend was almost as big as me. That was trouble I didn’t need.

"Yes, everything is in perfect working order.” I closed the panel and turned it back on. "You shouldn't have any trouble with it."

"I never have yet," she said cheerfully. "I don't know what we'd do without Egger Security."

"Probably paying protection money to the local mafia," I said, my expression deadpan.

There were a couple of gangs in Saltgrave Cove, but not the mafia. I'd say ‘not that I knew of,’ but I was certain they weren't operating here. Hel would never allow them to. Fade would probably annoy them to the point where they either killed him or left the city. The first one was more likely, I supposed.

Rachel giggled. "Then it's a very good thing you're around to keep us safe from them. Although, I've heard there's some hot mafia guys around."

"What do you know about hot mafia guys?" I asked curious in spite of myself.

She responded by giving me a wink and walking off to serve a customer. Probably better that I didn't get an answer to that question. Either she was related to them, or she read a lot of dark romance books. Yeah, I saw the ones Fade read. Not that I read them myself but I knew they were full of controlling men and assholes. All with big cocks.

Now I thought about it, we might be a bit like them, except we didn't go around taking out hits on people. Usually.

I pulled out my phone to log the job and look on the schedule for the next one. While I usually spent my nights as a guard, sometimes I took on the maintenance work. It kept me busy. If I was busy, Hel couldn't ask to give me a promotion like he did every other month. He wanted me to be his COO. I wanted nothing to do with it. I didn't want to be in the public eye like he was. Fuck that. I didn't need or want to be noticed. The background was safer.