Page 56 of Good Girls Beg

"I know I shouldn't ask, but here we are."

I swore under my breath. I knew that voice.

I turned to look at Teddie. She stood with one hand on her hip, her head cocked.

I wanted to grab a handful of her hair and… Honestly, the options from that point on were wide open. Push her to her knees so she could suck my cock. Pull her to me so I could kiss her. Yank her hair until she cried out with pain…

I shoved all of the possibilities out of my brain. "What are you not asking?"

"I'm not asking if you're okay and why you're grumbling to yourself," she said.

“Good, because you shouldn't," I said, not snapping at her, just responding.

"Because you're fine?" She straightened her head and looked at me. The daylight picked up the gold in her eyes, along with the disbelief.

"Yes," I said. "Why wouldn't I be fine?" If she was trying to psychoanalyze me, I was going to lose my shit. And by that I mean turn and walk away.

"I can think of a few reasons," she said. "For example, you live with Fade Mitchell. And, to a lesser extent, Hel Egger."

I squinted at her. "How do you figure I live with Hel to a lesser extent than Fade?"

She burst out laughing. I hated the thud in my chest, the response to seeing her smile. I needed to turn that off right now. Ignore it. Make it go away.

“No, I mean he's slightly more harmless than Fade. Or…less annoying anyway." She wrinkled her nose, which was cuter than it should have been.

I wanted to count the freckles on her face. I told myself I absolutely didn't want to lick them but I did.

"You don't know them very well," I pointed out.

"Are you saying Hel is annoying when you get to know him?" she asked. "Or are you trying to tell me Fade isn't as annoying as he lets on?"

I closed my eyes for a moment. “He's that annoying and more. Fade, I mean. Annoying isn't a word I'd used to describe Hel."

"What word would you use then?" She reached under the collar of her shirt to adjust her bra strap.

“Hel is difficult," I said. "He's very…" I searched for the right words.

"Intense?" she suggested. "Focused? Driven?"

"All of those," I agreed. "Can we stop talking about them now?"

"That depends, are you ready to talk about yourself?" She looked at me side on.

"You don't want to know about me," I said. "I'm not interesting.” I wasn't boring either, but I didn't want to share my innermost self. Nothing would turn her off faster.

"That's a matter of opinion," she said.

That stupid thumping in my chest happened again.

Fuck off, I grumbled at it. She was mine, I'd told her that much. That didn't mean I was going to fall in love with her. You could own someone without loving them. Right? It wasn't as if she was going to love me in return. We were like Beauty and the Beast except I was all beast, no handsome prince to turn into.

"You think I'm interesting?" I asked, letting my disbelief show on my face. That was better than vulnerability. Better than hoping she gave a shit.

“If I answer that you might get a big head," she said, looking cagey. Did her eyes have to smile like that?

"So you do think I'm interesting." I didn't know what to think. Did I want to be interesting? The word made me sound like a specimen in a jar on someone's shelf. I might have left specimens of myself in a jar, but I didn't want to have my whole body inside one.

No, I'm not telling that story right now. It's exactly what it sounds like.