Page 26 of The Jealous Girl

We were opposites in that regard. I couldn’t leave anything unfinished. I had to deal with it straight away. Otherwise, it tormented me. Circling in my head, preventing me from thinking of anything else.

Like this was.

I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. I couldn’t wait any longer. I had to tell him I wasn’t going back.

But the words still wouldn’t come. The truth was, I wasn’t sure I could stay here.

Not without him.

Silence stretched between us, filled only by the soft breaking of the waves.

‘What if we didn’t go?’ Ryan said suddenly.

I froze. My feet sinking slightly into the damp sand. I couldn’t have heard him right. I must have imagined it. Projected my own desire. My hope…

‘What if we just… stayed?’ Ryan’s words were hesitant and uncertain. ‘What if we stayed in Malta?’ he added, his voice gaining strength as though the idea was solidifying in his mind.

Confusion scattered my thoughts. ‘But graduation? Your parents?’

‘They’ll be angry, I know.’ He dragged a hand through his hair. ‘But it’s just one day, right? They’ll get over it.’

‘Really?’ Hope fluttered in my chest, but I fought to contain it. I couldn’t allow myself to get my hopes up. Just because he was considering skipping graduation, it didn’t mean he actually would. Not once he’d really thought it through. Not once he’d spoken to his parents.

‘Besides—’ Ryan hesitated ‘—it’s not like you really want to go anyway, do you?’

I blinked. ‘How did you know?’

A slow smile tugged at his lips. ‘I’m your boyfriend. It’s my job to know.’

My jaw dropped. ‘But I never said⁠—’

‘You didn’t have to. I can hear it in the things you don’t say. The way you never call home. The way you never talk about them. The way you looked at me when I asked what your dad had said about graduation.’ He shook his head slightly. ‘Would he or your stepmum even be there if we go back?’

I nibbled my lower lip. ‘I doubt it.’

‘Then it’s settled.’

‘But your parents would be there. You said your mum was really excited. She wants photos⁠—’

‘It’s not as though she hasn’t got enough photos already,’ Ryan cut in sharply. ‘She’ll get over her disappointment,’ he added more softly.

He made it sound so simple. But it was bigger than graduation. Bigger than just one day.

‘Weren’t you planning on going back home with them afterwards, though? To work in the business? To…’ My words trailed away. We’d talked about Blackwater Stables before, of course. About the horses, the land and the generations of Blackwaters who’d run the stables before his parents. But, whenever I mentioned his future there, he’d always gone quiet and withdrawn. I’d been too afraid to ask what that meant. Did he not see me as part of it?

‘Yeah, I guess everyone just sort of assumed I would,’ he said slowly. ‘Me included.’ He turned and stared out at the water but his gaze seemed to drift to somewhere beyond the sunset. ‘I don’t think I really chose it, though.’

His words felt heavy and pained. I’d always been so jealous of him. Having a family who missed him. Who wanted him to return. To be part of the business. Part of their lives.

It never occurred to me to ask if he wanted that.

‘So, you could stay in Malta a bit longer?’

Ryan smiled. ‘We could stay.’

My heart soared.

‘How long for?’ I edged forwards, reaching for his hand. ‘The whole summer? Maybe even a little longer…?’