Page 18 of Wanted: Rogues and Bards

Fenric bit back a smile. “You’ll get the hang of it.”

“He will get the hang of what?” Belstrom inquired as he wandered into the kitchen. He peered over Maxie’s shoulder while Malfas crossed to a different cabinet to grab the small container of cinnamon they possessed. The warlock had promised to only use a sprinkle. They had to make this a “valid” test by following a recipe.

Maxie scooped up the apples he’d cut and dropped them into a bowl. He sprinkled a tablespoon of sugar on top and then the cinnamon Malfas handed him. “We were talking about learning to wash clothes properly.”

“Ah, yes. There is an old philosopher who claims the righteous path to godliness is only through cleansing ourselves inside and out.” As he spoke, Belstrom reached over Maxie’s shoulder and pinched a small apple cube from the bowl.

Fenric sighed and said nothing as the giant barbarian popped the apple into his mouth and chewed.

Malfas joined him in a heavy exhale. “You shouldn’t have done that.”

“Why? He has not cooked it yet. He sliced the apple and added sugar.” Belstrom’s eyes jumped from Malfas to Fenric. Beads of sweat were already popping out on his forehead and his normally ruddy cheeks had gone pale, but Fenric wasn’t sure if the reaction was from the poison or Belstrom’s growing panic.

The warlock shrugged. “I don’t think that matters. How do you feel?”

“Quite unwell.”

Fenric stepped over to the back door and pulled it open. “Might as well move to the backyard. It will save us from having to call all the skelebabies to drag you out there.”

“But…”

“Hapi! We need you.” Maxie’s shout cut through the house.

It took three days to convince Hapi to let Maxie in the kitchen again. Maxie wasn’t exactly rushing back either. However, Maxie had now been an apprentice of the E.V.I.L. group for a week, and he had a steadily growing body count.

“He’s killed six people, and he’s been evil for only a week,” Rain crowed. “At this rate, he’d be on the Villains List inside of a year. Assuming the fucking shit wasn’t rigged to hell and back.”

Fenric rolled his eyes. “His body count might be six, but he’s killed two of those people twice. I’m not sure you’re allowed to count someone twice.”

“I think it should count,” Hapi interjected. “They were alive. Puppy made them unalive. That counts.”

Maxie twisted his fingers and shifted from one foot to the other as he watched Rain prepping the fish he’d caught for Maxie to cook. The idea was Rain would do all the gutting and descaling. He’d present Maxie with a perfect little fillet, and the young man’s only job was to add a tiny bit of seasoning and cook it.

“I know if I’m going to be a villain, I need to have a body count,” Maxie said in a soft, wavering voice. “But I don’t think it should count if the deaths were accidental. I also don’t think they should count if they were my own party members. That seems wrong.”

“First off, you can be evil and not kill a single person. There’s no rule saying all villains have to kill,” Fenric stated in a hard, firm voice. “Janice Codswald was a legendary thief and con artist. She was constantly in the top five of the Villains List in her prime.” Fenric suddenly glared at Rain and clenched his teeth, even though the man had his back to him. “And she earned her spot. She didn’t get it through bribery.”

“No, no!” Rain agreed, waving the knife he held in the air. “She was a real talent at what she did. No one ran a con like good old Janice. She could have conned the crown right off the king’s head if she wanted to.”

“And she never killed a soul. It was her code,” Fenric said.

“It’s just, as a poisoner…” Hapi held out his hands in front of him, leaving the rest of his statement to fade into nothing. The point was obvious. Poisoners killed. It was part of the job. People didn’t go to a poisoner because they wanted to make someone a little sick. Bad meat could handle that easy enough.

“Well, then…” Maxie sucked in a breath and tipped up his chin. “I’ll just have to come up with my own code. Like, I’ll only poison people who have it coming.”

Hapi arched a brow and looked over at Fenric, who could only shrug. Everyone had their own code. They just had to let Maxie figure out his.

“Okay. The fish is ready.” Rain put the knife down and stepped out of the kitchen to give Maxie some room to work. Hapi lingered close, his sharp eyes taking in Maxie’s every movement.

When the fish was cooked and smelling delicious—like everything Maxie cooked—Hapi shook his head.

“I still wouldn’t eat it,” he warned.

“All he did was cook it. A little bit of heat couldn’t have made it poisonous,” Rain argued, picking up a fork.

“Oh, so you’re an expert in magic now?”

“Just a bit won’t hurt.”